Backsliding ... stupid sad songs LettinGo: I am sitting here playing three old Toni Braxton songs over and over again ... Breathe Again, Unbreak My Heart, and How Could An Angel Break My Heart.
:-[
I don't know what is wrong with me. For the first time since last summer, I feel devastated - again. I had been doing so well. I am not mourning the loss of my husband SPECIFICALLY, but the fact that I feel like I will never have anything special with anyone. I don't understand how he is this creep and always has more than one woman (and he is not particularly good looking, nor has any money to attract them)! But I am a genuinely good person, a good mom, smart, professional ... and I will be alone forever because of how my life has ended up ... far too much baggage to be worth anything to anyone. How stupid I am to make the mistakes I have made! I have completely screwed everything up.
I am terrified that I am going to go through life without knowing what true love feels like, but I feel that I am destined to be that way.
Not really looking for a response, I just wanted to write this.
Re:Backsliding ... stupid sad songs box of rain: Time to expand your music collection!!!! Fleetwood Mac's whole rumours album is good if you are looking for heartbreak music, but it has more of an edge, then try some more uplifting stuff. I'm a bit of a dead head, and the song I quote at the bottom of my posts, which is my screen name, is more optimistic. I'm only a couple weeks out on my breakup, but the optimistic music helps a lot.
Re:Backsliding ... stupid sad songs 2tadpoles: [quote author=LettinGo link=board=20;threadid=10041;start=0#msg79971 date=1113353747">
... and I will be alone forever because of how my life has ended up ... far too much baggage to be worth anything to anyone. [/quote">
I feel the same way. I'm going through my second divorce. My first husband was just a huge mistake; I got married at 18 to a guy I barely knew. In retrospect, I think it was just to get away from my parents. Anyway, he turned out to be abusive, so I left him. This time, my husband of almost 11 years is having his second affair, and he dumped me. He dumped me the first time, too, but I took him back.
So here I am, a stb-twice-divorced mother of two sons. People tell me, "You're so pretty and smart! Your husband's an idiot! Someone great will come along." I'm working as a waitress, I homeschool my kids, and I'm an atheist. Yeah, right.... I'm sure there's someone out there for me. ::)
Re:Backsliding ... stupid sad songs hollygolightly: If one more person tells me how "pretty and smart and wonderful" I am and how some great guy is going to come along just when I'm not looking I think I will throw something at them!
I had a bad night last night too, just thinking how am I ever going to meet anyone, let alone find someone who doesn't irritate me? I'm 34, so all the men older than me already want a cute twenty-something and all the men younger than men still want a cute twenty-something. And I'm a teacher, so I work with all women, so the chances of getting to know someone through work are out. I never thought I'd be 34 and all alone.
Re:Backsliding ... stupid sad songs LettinGo: Okay, so you both know exactly where I am coming from.
We are terrific women! So why do we feel this way? (LOL) Tadpole ... seriously - you work and homeschool your children? That is awesome. And Holly ... a teacher, one of the greatest professions you could have chosen - I can SO RELATE to the stupid pretty,smart, wonderful comments.
Does anyone ever look at other people you know who are not attractive (and by that, I mean on the INSIDE as well - just not NICE people) and wonder how the hell they have someone that loves them, but you don't?
Let's just throw a huge pity party. I made myself turn off the sad music on the way to work this morning, but I am not feeling any better.
We aren't even old, girls ... lol ... but the thought of still being single in ten years, twenty years, is utterly depressing. Even more depressing is browsing match.com and seeing what comes up in my area! :-X Lmao!
Going to drown myself in my coffee now ...
Kel
Click More for the next page.
