Hot and Cold shango: I recently (once again) initiated contact with my STBX while she was out of the country on business and it lead to a series of friendly emails in which I could see she was starting to let down her walls. In one email she stated that she wasn't sure if she was ok with the contact we where having, then in the next (after she recieved my birthday gift to her) she stated that she wished we had started talking sooner because she wanted to call me on my birthday (19 days before hers). Anyway, we have this great repore going and all of a sudden after returning home from her trip she's being distant again... There are no false pretences of how I feel about her because she knows that I still love her and don't want the divorce, yet I've kept all contact friendly and breezy (no mention of feelings or the divorce) Maybe she was having a moment of weakness, or maybe she was just lonely on her trip and I was someone she could lean on, or maybe she got scared by her sudden vulnerablitiy. I don't know, but its frustrating to know that she still cares yet intentionally tries to force those feelings away. Dammit thats what I get for falling in love with an Aries LoL... guess it's just the price I pay for having unconditional love.
Anyone else's STBX get hot and cold like this?
Re:Hot and Cold Chey: Hey Shango,
I think you hit the nail right on the head. I think she was away from home, perhaps a bit lonely, homesick, vulnerable? You were familiar and she let her guard down, because you were a safe distance away.
Back home it's all hitting a little too "close to home", she's back in her familiar surroundings. But all is not lost, perhaps you have made some ground here. Just take things easy, and perhaps ease off now and let her mull things over.
Good luck :)
Chey
Re:Hot and Cold shango: Thanks for replying Chey, I think you're right. I'm going to back off for a while and give her space to figure things out. Now I'm leaving town for a few weeks on business, so maybe she'll drop her defenses again if I wait a week or so and contact her from the road. You have very good insight, I didn't even see it from that perspective, thanks again ;D
Re:Hot and Cold Knight: hmm - I would die to have my ex even talk to me for a second, so in a way you are blessed... at least you still here from time to time from the lone you love - others are left with no one.
