Hurt AGAIN justmenow: How many times am I going to let this happen to me? ???
I'm so sick of being stepped on, taken for granted, ignored like my time means nothing, cast aside, etc. Here's a hypothetical for ya. Met this guy, went out quite a bit at first (like 3-4 times / week). Treated me like a queen, like I was important to him, we had so much in common and had so much fun together - comfortable, laughing, etc. After 3 weeks and an impromptou trip out of town, Buh-bye - he suddenly backs away, not ready for a "relationship", scared because things went "too fast", he needs to get himself together, "It's not you, it's me" blah blah blah. Just read chapter 1 of the "how to blow someone off" book and that's what I got. "Let's just be friends".
Ok, so I back off - no calls, emails, etc. The last thing I want to be is around when I'm not wanted. I play the rules exactly as he requested them. Ok, so he says he's going to stop by last night (NOT at my request, but his) and I was really looking forward to seeing him. Probably got more excited than I should have (to myself, not to him), but then he proceeds to blow me off. He didn't even call. I was crushed AGAIN!! So I call him - "Oh, I forgot"
Thanks. That really made me feel worth the effort. Why do I let this happen? My X treated me better than that. What did I do to deserve this? What is WRONG with me?
Re:Hurt AGAIN JASPER: There is nothing wrong with you it was him who freaked out.Stop being so hard on yourself just because he turned out to be an insensitive jerk for whatever reason has no reflect on you.
We all know the dating scene is tough at least you found out he was flake before you fell any furthur for him. May be you should take sometime and just date for awhile without expecting to much out of it.See that way you have other options so you wont get so dependant on one person to quickly.
I'm sorry things didn't work out like you hoped but it does get better you just have to learn how to play the game the way the men play it. ;)
Re:Hurt AGAIN TiredandScared: JMN I'm sorry to hear about this, don't worry he's the one with issues (but don't we all) If he's like this now, how would he be down the road when the comfort level creaps in? That was my issue when I was with my STBX, I got way to comfortable and forgot to look at the love and caring every day. So on one hand I guess its better to see issues early.
I hope thing truely get better for you!
Re:Hurt AGAIN justmenow: You're right - and he even ADMITTED he has issues. He made that very clear to me and I chose to ignore that. "Well, maybe his issues aren't as bad as he makes them out to be - he's just preparing me for the worst."
See? I set myself up for this! Why do I do that? Over and over and over again. He DOES have issues and I KNEW that. So how can I be mad and hurt that he blew me off? Why do I put up with that? Self-destruction seems to be my specialty lately.
Thanks for everyone's encouragement though. I may just be ok someday.
Re:Hurt AGAIN TiredandScared: Some times you just have to let go, you are not doing ANYTHING different than anyone else, you are not self destructive you are just doing what you know. Just learn form it and next time you will know more. Just chalk it up and move on to the next small piece of your life. It will get better, it always does.
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