Re:Hurt AGAIN Safetykc: I hear you Ostia. Except I made the opposite mistake. I was 28 going on 29 when I met my STBX and had never been married before. She had for 8 years so I thought she was stable, but turned out to be quite crazy. I missed all the signs because I didn't know what to look for. She had two wonderful kids from a previous marriage, so it was instant family, just add water or love. Anyway it didn't work so now I have no idea if choosing someone because they have been married before or in a serious relationship is the right answer. I guess you just have to hope you know the person and trust your instincts. And watch out for the signs. I thought living together over a year prior to marriage was enough time to know each others strengths but I guess not. I guess there isn't a magic answer to how long you date. I wish I had waited longer, but of course, hindsight 20/20. Lol. Good luck to everyone reentering the dating pool. God knows we have been hurt enough and deserve some luck next time around. ;D
Re:Hurt AGAIN ostia: [quote author=Safetykc link=board=1;threadid=1056;start=0#msg6796 date=1064617666">
I thought living together over a year prior to marriage was enough time to know each others strengths but I guess not. I guess there isn't a magic answer to how long you date. I wish I had waited longer, but of course, hindsight 20/20. [/quote">
Well, I lived with my H for 7 happy years before marrying him, and the first 2 or 3 years of the marriage were very happy, too...then aliens took over his brain. Just goes to show you that you never know what going to happen, no matter how cautious you are!
Re:Hurt AGAIN barelybreathing: I am telling you, my cave is a very comforting dwelling....
Oh boy......what a journey for us all.
Justmenow,
You are a survivor, you will weather this.
I have accepted that my X is Heckyl and Jyde now. And I have no expectations of him anymore. Its easier that way. One day he is sweet the next he is angry. Oh well, sounds tiring to me really.
This is not about him its about you. Figure out what your trigger buttons are with him so that you may diffuse any future reactions.....
BB
