Don't Know what to do confusedat25: Hello everyone I am new to the board. I need some advice from people who are going through this or have been through this.
I have been with my husband for almost 9 years and married for 17 months. We have a 3 year old daughter. Here is the short version. My husband and I have been having financial troubles plus he hates his job. I have done everything I can to try and make the money troubles less stressful plus help him find a job. Three weeks ago I over heard him say to my friends that the only reason he was with my was b/c of our daughter. I got upset when I heard that and confronted him. Basically the last three weeks he has been trying to decided whether he wants to stay, separate, or divorce. He says its b/c I stress about money which I do b/c he consistantly calls into work not to mention his drinking has signifcantly increased. He also says that he feels that he has missed out on his single life and he wants to leave so he can go party and date other people. The problem is that he says he loves me but it keeps tugging at him that he has not experienced these things. He wants to separate for the most part and come back when he is done. I mentally and emotionally can not do that. I love him but not enough to deal with all of this.
Re:Don't Know what to do hudson: Hey confusedat25,
I'm sorry you have to deal with all of this. It really sucks. Your husband is behaving like a idiot. But you know, it could very well be that he is feeling really insecure and incompetant and therefore feels the need to compensate by pretending that he doesn't need you. I know it sounds crazy, but men are crazy. Just a thought.
Don't take his crap! Stand up to him and let him know that he is not going to treat you like this. He needs to get his drinking under control and he needs to start behaving like a husband, not a bum. If he is bluffing, call his bluff. You need to assert yourself and let him know that you mean business.
Just my two cent, that's all.
