Mr. Speedy clambakesX: I think I met MichelleOC's guy's twin brother ...
On Sunday, I met this guy whose profile listed some details that are important to me and not too common. We got on okay. He was married young, and since his wife died 6 years ago he hasn't had much success with dating. (I'm starting to understand why.)
On Wed. am. we met for coffee from 7-8, and by 10 this e-mail was in my box. (Plus a couple of messages on my machine, as I found out later.)
I ran this through an on-line translator and then cleaned it up, so it's not a direct quote, but his writing really is this flowery -
"Dear Medusa,
I simply have to write to you, because I'm so overwhelmed by my feelings, I have to let them out or I'll burst.
Last night I couldn't sleep. I was so nervous! 1000 thoughts ran through my head - was my impression of you on Sunday correct? How did you see things?
Then as I saw you sitting in front of (name of cafe), I was so touched, and inside when we hugged, I could feel that you wanted to be close to me, I was flooded with feelings, full of hopes (and fears, I admit).
I want to learn everything about you, all at once. I have butterflies in my stomach - in other words, I'm falling in love with the nicest, smartest, sexiest, most attractive, most erotic, most feminine all women, in Medusa.
I want to spend a night with you, just to feel you, to talk, to get to know you.
Oh, Medusa - what are you doing to me? I haven't felt this way in so long.
Words fail me!
All my love,
PsychoStalker"
I shouldn't have given him a hug, but I was happy to see him, and forgive my reptilian nature, but he looks really, really good.
Wed. pm he requested another return call, and when I called he wanted to meet that night. (????) I said I couldnt, it was too much too soon. He got pouty and had to go because his drawing class was starting. I hung up and seriously wondered if he has dozens of corpses of women hidden under granite slabs in his basement.
Thu. a.m. I called him early, to see if he was maybe human despite my worst fantasies and to talk out the too-fast thing and see if he could understand. He had gotten drunk after his class and was kind of slow to get talking, but it turned out to be worth the effort of getting him to talk.
He'd been planning to surprise me at the 10K race I ran yesterday. (It was a holiday where I live.) "Just" to show up and cheer me on and take some pictures.
The race was about an hour from where I live.
I told him that if he'd shown up, there would be NO chance at all of any further contact.
"Surprises" like this are totally something my father loves to do, and the "off" bit matches my dad as well. This is not a good thing. No wonder I've only ever dated men who remind me of my mother. (Which is also not a good thing.)
Oh, and he'd actually thought we could go somewhere this weekend and spend the night together, just cuddling and talking. (To his credit - or does this make it worse? - I never got the impression he was looking for sex - he's looking for a secure relationship.) Um, yeah like I overnight within a week of meeting someone, all the time. ???
He also said that he thought it would be nice, if I came out of the house one morning and he was standing there with flowers just to say good morning, but he doesn't know where I live.
What do I have to do to attract normal men? or at least to stop attracting ones who aren't quite well?
And what is wrong with me that I feel about 10% flattered by this when he doesn't know me at all? I'd love to think that someone could truly know me AND think all these things about me.
Re:Mr. Speedy sacoderisa: haha, well, look closely, if they sound weird.............THEY ARE. I wouldn't go all out the first week or so.......maybe not even the first month. well, I would let them know that i am interested, but not to the point of going out of my way to seem too "romantic".......see, guys get those ideas from movies, if you pull them out in reality, you become a stalker or a psycho......oh well, for more info PM me, and I will be glad to show you girls how a good man goes about the dating thing
PS....no I am not trying to hook up, I am still..........not hopeful but dumb.......that I can hold a while for this girl to make up her mind..........dumb huh?
Re:Mr. Speedy Bubba: Wow - I think I would be scared too! Seriously, that is nuts!!! Perhaps it is different in Europe, and that is what guys are like, but come on buddy. Easy boy. Down!
I honestly don't know what to say. If a woman said and acted like this in the first week. I would smile, nod, and say: Bye Bye. I keep thinking of the scene from Fatal Attraction when she boiled the pet bunny.
Hints where normal guys are:
- Pubs having a beer after work or after a sporting event. Not a bar, a pub. Bars are meat markets. Pubs usually are just guys out to relax not pick up.
- sporting events (a la' your 10k races)
Hmmmm I will think more as the day goes.
Evil Bubba
Re:Mr. Speedy AmyMarie1972: I would stay well away from this guy and check around to see if anyone has escaped from a jail or psycho ward.
No guys in Europe do not or rather should not behave like this.
I am dating a guy and he is really sweet. Been dating for just coming up for two weeks and we are taking it all slowly, well the romance and feelings stuff anyway. He knows my situation and is happy with this. If he turned around and said that he loved me I would be hey back off.
Even with the ex it took months before we started to do all the mushy stuff. I like the mushy stuff but only with someone that I really care about.
This guy is totally mad and i would really tell him that you are just not interested.
Amy
Re:Mr. Speedy raistlynne: LOL! ;D And here I was thinking, dang, this one hooked up with my stbxh (he's speedy, but not in the way described here). :P
I think that if he was ever "okay" in the head, it sure as heck ain't now. If I were to give him the benefit of the doubt (and this would be only after I personally verified that no, there are no corpses under the concrete slab in his basement), I would say this guy is probably going overboard because he feels that lonely. He sounds incredibly needy, and after so many years of being alone, who wouldn't be? Not knowing the whole story, I do have to say that I met someone like that when I was young and cute. He got less weird after I slapped some serious boundaries shortly after date #1, but he never became the kind of man I truly desired as a life mate. He, too, had spent quite some time alone (for different reasons), but once he knew where he stood and how far he could go, he wasn't so bad. If you feel he is worth a second shot, go for it, just go in with your eyes open. No one gets passed up for that long without good reason.
Just my two cents.
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