How do you turn loose of the home? confusedkelly: Whether male or female, I know there are plenty of us who are not going to get the house for one reason or another. Mine is financial.
He can afford the house and I cannot. We designed it, subcontracted it, I decorated it and landscaped it. I am so proud of my hard work and now he gets to keep it and will probably one day be sharing it with someone else.
How do you go through this without going insane?
How long does it take to adjust to this when you go to something that is 1/2 of what you had? I have never been a jealous person, but worry I will be after this is all over with.
My heart is in those walls, how do I get it out?
Re:How do you turn loose of the home? clambakesX: Oh, bloody jeepers.
I can empathize a little - I spent my teen years building a vacation house with my father. And last year, it was given to my sister.
Can you bill him for the work you put into the house? That would only be fair ... but I don't know how you can go about this on legal terms.
Re:How do you turn loose of the home? tigger: i can sympathise - i lived in my ex's house, putting off buying my own as i thought we would end up getting another together. how much time and effort did i put into renovating that place, and i was proud of it too. Financially i didn't have anything in the place, but i had plenty in so many other ways.
Its now worth almost twice what it was when she bought it, although not all my doing. I guess the only thing i can get out of it is that she is always surrounded by things i did & made, not that she probably cares anymore. Like you i loved that place, it is a seaside suburb, i love the drive past the beach - now i live back in the city suburbs, no water to be seen and not enough money to go back
Re:How do you turn loose of the home? AmyMarie1972: We bought our house together 4 years ago, the first house that we owned which was a big step for us. He walked out and wants his half. I dont have to give it to him until the youngest child gets to 17 but can not really afford the mortgage payments so I am having to sell. This I find is sad because the house stood for so much, like first run on the ladder so to speak.
I have invested alot of time in the place, it is a late Victorian house and I have been putting back some of the original features including the old cast iron firplaces which I think look great.
Have got to leave it all behind now when I sell. Luckily I dont have the problem that my ex will be living in it as you do and i am thankful of that. I would not be able to deal with someone else getting all my hard work.
Stay strong and try not to think about it, I know, not easy. Tell him that he cant have it, you are selling it.
Surely you are entitled to something from it?
Take care
Amy
