What I feel... SweetyTweety: is so much pain. I've been running away from feeling hurt; from realizing how bad you treated me. I have my family and friends watching out for me, caring for me but all they could do is watch and wait for me to pass this turmoil inside of me.
I know I was a good wife and that I deserved better and I tried very hard. I put my 100% (and more) just to make you see that life can be good together but you just didn't get it. And now to think that you would grow up and realize that we should let bygones be bygones but you don't want to do that. You want to make a war and I just want a new life without you. You have no right to treat me like dirt but you believe that the way I should be treated. How dare you? Who do you think you are? How could you? For 9 years you made my life empty and I don't know any other way but I want to fill that void and I want to be happy but I need you to be out of my life. The children are doing well but they are disappointed in you. It's your loss, not ours. You soon feel the pain and hurt that we feel now and let me tell you...it's the most horrible thing to go through. Even though I am so livid with you I don't wish you to through what I am going through. It's not that I love you it's just nobody should go through these kinds of painful moments.
I'm ready to cry and release all of this tension and hurt but I can't seem to do it. Not yet, but, maybe, soon enough my time will come to be able to breathe again. I just don't know why you decided to treat me so bad. I know I was good to you. But you pushed me so far over the edge that I had to ask for the divorce...yes, you were shocked but how much longer did you expect me to take this type of treatment? You left me alone so I decided to walk away (good decision on my part). That day was the day I actually took care of myself and I have a long way to go but please just leave me alone. I'm tired of getting hurt and stepped on. Oh by the way, thanks for keying my car. Nice job. Try growing up, it would be nice.
Never regretful.
