Re:Marriage Strike lemondrop: Phyxius,
This is good information. I'm a woman and can't help feeling that there is little incentive for me to ever marry again and there is just too much to risk. I've worked hard to put myself through school. I've made sacrifices to get out from under debt. My divorce set me back further than I could have imagined at the time. But now that I'm back on my feet and finding financial success, I just can't see myself ever jeopardizing my financial well being again just to be "Mrs. So and so". It's just not worth it. So I say AMEN to your article.
Lemondrop
Re:Marriage Strike Cowboy12: Amen brother, I know there are some great women on here, and I'm not about to rubbish them, and neither are you Phyxius , but it's so unfair, the current court system , and the same applies here, in little ol' Irealnd, that a man is basically screwed, my wife has told me she will lie about domestic violence on her papers, as this will go down well in court, there are a lot of old judges, out there that belive everything a pretty woman in front of them tells them...amkes me sick, when there are good people of both sexes on here who only want basic justice.
Re:Marriage Strike dreamerpoet: Amen to all that. I am sure you don't lump absolutely everyone into that category however, I do believe that the feminist movement did a lot to mess up or otherwise rearrange the way things were meant to be or should be. I can tell you one thing I have way more freedom and benefits being single with my kids than I would were I to get married. The father in this situation however is the one that initiated and walked away on us and I am the one to watch my son run yelling daddy daddy come back and have his dad not even care. He parties and I bust my @ss to earn a living and support my kids. And he should damn well pay support because he has all the fun and freedom and I have all the responsibility.
Re:Marriage Strike jillieb44: Yes, in some cases it's just not fair. My neighbor's wife cheated on him with his own contractor, and when he went to his attorney to see about filing, his attorney basically said he'd lose his house, his kids, and he'd still be paying for it all. So he chose to reconcile with her, despite her cheating. They're still married.
Meanwhile I'm divorcing. But *I* left the ex, left him his da*ned house, and took the kids. Now I'm renting a similar house, had to take a second job to pay the bills, but unlike the whiny ex, *I* do what's needed and don't complain. My kids are happy with me. They're grumpy with him. Wonder why.
It's gonna be a b*tch getting him to pay his child support, but I can't wait to see how much they stick him for. Right into the bank ;)
Jillie
Re:Marriage Strike Lome: Well. this certainly makes marriage seem to be completely useless. This will sound like a flame...it is not what I am trying to do. I understand that there are many honorable men here...but...I am just miffed that basically women can't be trusted and in the end are just out to rob you blind.
It also sounds like these men are failures...they fail because they lack the courage to even make a half decent attempt at doing the right thing.
So here goes female side of this. It will cause offense...Again, I am sorry.
Here is what I am hearing.. (again...this is aimed at the guys in the study)..
Man view: I hate being in this tux. But, as I am an honorable man....tradition has it that I marry her infront of God and man.
female view: If I spend a whole lot of money and then say a few lines ....blah, blah, blah...then everyone can start the count down as to when I can get rid of this goof ball and start really living on my own...I just hate to work and think about money....
Secret Female view: housekeeping and others=new car and a few vacations
man view: can't have kids...she will only use them to hurt me and get more cash
female view: since he has no idea where they come from...hmmm...if each child is worth 1/3 of his salary....I can have 14 kids and that will not only leave him broke then I can take all those babies and move to the mystery shoe...yep, that way I can get the check mailed and never have to see his sorry face again.
So the moral to this tale...Cup Cake will play all nice nice until she and her evil old lawyer finds a way to steal some poor innocent man's income, retirement, and future....Mean old Cup Cake! Yep, better to just bed her (by the way...in the States that is generally called Common Law and you still can get stuck with Pallimony and child support) . Yep! Just can't trust Cup Cake.
By the way....What about all of us Cup Cakes in No Fault states....or better yet...us with a degree? I would get half assets/debt and no alimony...
My vows mattered to me. I kept them. I honored my husband and myself....I have not lied or cheated. I simply loved a man who made a really bad mistake. Do I hate him...H*ll no! He is just went insane and became very selfish. Do I think that trust will be an issue in the future? Actually, yes. I did not know about the affair for 8 weeks after he vanished. I did not know he even was unhappy until I was served with papers (the affair was discovered the next day).
So...I did it all wrong. I should have started this marriage 15 years ago thinking what was the minimum time I needed to bed the jerk to get the maximum amount of money. I wasted alot of money of some white dress and ceremony.
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