Why is it??? twobeautifulkids: My is it that if I was such a great wife as my tbx repeatedly tells me that I get saddled with so much responsibility and he can get away with doing so little?!?!? It just doesn't seem fair. None of it is fair, but the overwhelming feeling of having too many things fall on my shoulders has been eating away at me for a day or two again.
Re:Why is it??? wpgilbe: 2BK
I am sure that my stbx feels the same, although before all of this started, I took on a lot of responsibility. Have you been a stay-at-home mom? My stbx has, and my inclination (in repsonse to her request for a divorce) has been to back off of a lot of the things that I used to do and show her exactly how much I HAD done. I don't think that she had an appreciation for my contributions. I can't be alone in this approach, not that it is necessarily the right thing to do.
Bottom line is that I am sure that my stbx feels overwhelmed with the things that she will have to take on. Personally, I'm glad that it's a bit uncomfortable for her. Maybe that's what your tbx is doing?
Re:Why is it??? twobeautifulkids: But he left me. :( I didn't ask for any of this. Yes, I've been a SAHM for 7 years. Since he left, I've started back to college as well. I did most of the childrearing, most of the yard work, most of the cooking, etc. I didn't mind it for the most part, but there are things I won't do- like weatherproof the fence, or clean out the shed, or....the list goes on. He wasn't great about doing the stuff when he was here...ultimate procrastinator...and he's even worse about it now that he's not living here, yet he claimed he'd help out because he wants the kids and me to stay in this house. And now I'm resentful of HAVING to do the things I did before just because I wanted to (I always wanted to make things easy on him). It really just seems like he's got it so easy. :-\
Re:Why is it??? heartbroken4: I so agree with what you are so saying. It seems so easy for them at times. Granted I am the one who left who had enough, enough being an understatement but my x has it so easy. He quit his job to get another one and it didnt fall through and now he is just hanging out living off of his parents and unemployment for a while its pathetic. He has all the excuses in the world why he cant help me out with money.
And when I mention how hard it is being a single parent his answer is well it would be easier if you came back. Ehhhh I hate that, I just want him to pay me what he owes and I will be fine.
Hang in there!
