Re:No dating during separation Ilosther: I agree, she'll do what she wants during the separation. If she does date after saying she wouldn't,
I know truly how weak she is.
Me dating to make her jealous or even just make me feel good. As much as I would like to find another "body" to fill the physical void that she will leave, I have to be strong and stick this out. If I get burned in the end, I have the rest of my life to recover.
To me, its and all or nothing deal now, I'm fighting for my son and myself, and I dont want to lose the 3rd member of our family.
How confused she is, but also how stubborn. If she wants to prove to the world she is better for doing this, I can't control that. But I will continue fighting this until she serves me the papers.
thanks folks!
oh yeah, the no date clause was my idea. sure it might show my insecurity, but she agreed right away to it. i too dont think she is cheating on me, or will, but you never know, you never know
Re:No dating during separation flamingo13: [quote author=Havehope link=board=1;threadid=14013;start=0#msg119347 date=1120396971">
Me dating to make her jealous or even just make me feel good. As much as I would like to find another "body" to fill the physical void that she will leave, I have to be strong and stick this out. If I get burned in the end, I have the rest of my life to recover.
To me, its and all or nothing deal now, I'm fighting for my son and myself, and I dont want to lose the 3rd member of our family. [/quote">
Good for you! It is the harder road, but the better one in my opinion. If my experiences (!more than once!) are any indication, it will serve you and your child better in the long run. You will not be burned in the end. There will *always* be time to date, however, you can never go back and change it all later if you did date and regret it.
[Quote"> oh yeah, the no date clause was my idea. sure it might show my insecurity, but she agreed right away to it. i too dont think she is cheating on me, or will, but you never know, you never know
[/quote">
Everyone is insecure when the person they care about them leaves. It is normal. The 'no date clause' was in the marriage ceremony/vow or implicit in marriage itself. Don't over analyze wanting a seperation without dating. You wanted a marriage without cheating, right?
I wish you all the best.
Re:No dating during separation sacoderisa: Dude, sorry if i call you dude, but i feel everybody here is a friend. anyways, I didn't get married, I didn't date anybody, I am there for her, she did dated someone, it hurts like hell.....we now are sorta separated. We act like a couple, except when there is people around that knows us. I guess she wants to see if it will work this time. All i can do is be myself, she told me i would be the perfect husband, but she is not ready to be in a serious relationship.........nevertheless she is spending all her time with me.......it gets better, if you guys have a good marriage it will stand.........i prayed for her to come back........at least she didn't go away definitelly. that's a start.
Re:No dating during separation AmyMarie1972: Hi HH,
You must do whatever you want or need to do to stay true to yourself so that you can hold your head with pride.
Everyone is right when they say that you can't control what your wife does or doesn't do, but during the separation try not to spend your time wondering what she is up to, it will drive you crazy.
Stay strong and take care
Amy
Re:No dating during separation Repentant: [quote author=amymarie1972 link=board=1;threadid=14013;start=0#msg119781 date=1120465421">
during the separation try not to spend your time wondering what she is up to, it will drive you crazy.
[/quote">
That was my point, make her go crazy wondering who you are with. At the moment she is secure thinking that you are holed up in some corner....at the moment she can have you whenever, however she wants you.
She won't desire you at all whilst she sees you like that.
So why not agree- act like you agree with the separation. Act indifferent.Tell her she's right and that it can't work.
Start doing things that make you more attractive to her- dress well, go out and do more things socially.
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