Re: Need Advice BAD! Wife wants to move out-TOGETHER Ilosther: I'm so confused. I dont know how to feel. But I gotta believe this has got to be a first step in getting things straightened out. I mean, I was probably even giving her the option to walk away and divorce or stay and work it out.
She chose stay, even though it's killing her.
Even our therapist said, when she can't make a decision on her own, since she is so indecisive, I have to step in and offer suggestions, not force her, but say, "what do you think about this?" And that's what I've been doing, I've been offerin her all types of options.
She broke down and chose this one, as if she's given up on herself.
She doesnt know what she wants. I dont know how it will be living together, but if she is still willing to, I'm going to do it. F%%K, she had a choice, she chose this one, whether impulsive or not.
So confused, but moving on. I'll start calling around apts, so will she. Her actions and words seem to be speaking in tongues.
God, I need help
Re: Need Advice BAD! Wife wants to move out-TOGETHER myowncanoe: You do have help ... and support and suggestions and love :)
I hope the move together goes ahead and works well. It is a positive 'together' action in some ways and IMO I think that your wife will feel a lot better once away from the parents. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt - it sucked ;)
Re: Need Advice BAD! Wife wants to move out-TOGETHER Ilosther: I'm scared out of my mind of this woman now. I want to live with her, yes for the sake of our son, but will we be fighting the whole time? That wont be healthy for our son. As much as I dont want to give up 50% custody of him, the danger of my wife and I being really uncomfortable around each other exists.
In the beginning of all this, this is what I wanted. Now I think she might be better off moving out on her own, whenever she can find an apartment.
Yeah, I want this to work out, but will us moving in together just make her a shell of herself since she now is not getting what she wants?
I am not forcing any issue, if she really wants to move in together, I'll do it. If she can still find a place of her own, then fine, that's what we originally agreed on. Its just her and my inpatience in trying to resolve this, but I cant control finding an apartment.
I just ate lunch, and I feel like throwing it all up. I am scared to see her when I get home from work. And I also keep thinking she might be seeking an emotional affair with someone at her work-but then why want to move in with me?
I dont know anymore, my mind is sinking fast, I dont know if the AC in my office is too cold, but I'm shaking.
I need to focus, I can't...oh man, I stay strong then I get weak like this.....
Re: Need Advice BAD! Wife wants to move out-TOGETHER Older Guy: [quote author=Havehope link=topic=14531.msg121753#msg121753 date=1120755039"> I need to focus, I can't...oh man, I stay strong then I get weak like this.....
[/quote">
Don't worry about it - we all do that ! It seems to be quite normal
Re: Need Advice BAD! Wife wants to move out-TOGETHER sourpuss: i wish you all the luck in the world, you are going to need it.
be very careful with yourself, emotionally & financially. i agree with marajade, she sounds very angry that the being on her own wouldn't be as easy as she thought it would be. if you continue living together, i fear that anger will be directed at you.
and just throwing this out there, are the 2 of you still going to be a couple or just roomies? how fun will it be seeing her date?
also, if this doesn't work, what then? i assume you guys live with the folks for financial reasons. the pressure of being broke without a safety net will not help your marriage.
perhaps her expectations of life on her own were unrealistic. have the 2 of you sat down together and tried to figure out a way that she can be on her own?
i know it's awful for you, but i don't think she wants to work on the marriage, she is using you as a way out of mom & dad's.
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