Fling? jillieb44: Okay, so I've hinted around this weekend about this new fling. I say that because there is so much physical/sexual chemistry, but likely not a true emotional/falling in love/true relationship attraction.
I was on a dating site trying to reply to this other guy I'd been e-mailing til my subscription ran out and after I resubscribed found this new guy's profile. Totally off the wall, irreverent, but rang of truth. I had to e-mail.
Just 2 days later (and before my usual 'meet in a public place' rule) he offered a ride on his Harley. I couldnt' say no; he was in my driveway in an hour.
The chemistry was instant and we were both shocked. The ride was awesome. Yet I know there is no relationship potential here. He is very opinionated, cynical (in a funny way, but so was the ex and it gets very grating, I know from experience), kind of crude, is likely seeing other women (or would if he had the chance, I'm sure); not a player in today's sense but a throwback to the 70s in a hippie sort of way.
I'm soooo physically attracted and can't seem to stay away, even though I know there will likely NOT be any kind of true emotional attraction or bond or relationship.
Is that such a bad thing if you go into it with eyes wide open? I've never done this sort of thing ever in my life before. On the one hand it's a real ego boost; on the other there is no other prospects for dating (not that I need a boyfriend right now, but...) and the attraction is there, so what is the harm?
I never dated much before the ex, only had one dating experience post-ex, where yes, I was emotionally involved after the 3rd date.
Thoughts? Or am I just heading for a train wreck???
Jillie
Re: Fling? whatnext: Jillie,
I would ask the following:
Are you enjoying yourself?
Is this man respectful of you?
Do you feel safe/are you being safe?
If you told him to go away forever and never contact you again, do you think he would?
Are you being honest together and with yourself.
I think if you can say yes to those questions, you should do as you please.
John
Re: Fling? PiscesGoddess: I agree with John Jillie.. If you can ask yourself those questions and the answers are positive then go for it! Isnt it nice to go into something with your eyes wide open for a change? So many of us go into things with blinders on..its nice to see the light for a change ;)
This sounds exactly like how me and my hubby started out..(not that Im an example..you not going to marry this guy :o) but I remember how fun it was and how neither want of us wanted anything more than just what it was. Of course it develped into that ..but sometimes I miss those days when it was just fun and open..and ..ahh.. free...
You do want you want honey and enjoy it..People try to put labels on relationships so often and sometimes it just is what it is..and its nice to not have the drama for a change.
Keep us posted ;)
Pisces
Re: Fling? jen: Jillie,
I think whatnext's questions are very helpful. I think the most important one is if you are truly being honest with yourself and up front with each other about what this fling will/will not mean.
I just know from my own experience how difficult it is to have "just" a fling, especially when there is such a strong chemistry. At some point, our emotions usually get on that train with us ;)
That's not to suggest that you shouldn't go for it...only that it's important that you do so with your eyes wide open.
Good luck!
mtmo
Re: Fling? Lome: Jillie,
take their advice, if it still feels right....have a blast!
On a personal note....you need to buy your own helmet and always wear boots and jeans atleast....pavement burn is a bear and scars ::)
leather is better...and way more sexy !
Click More for the next page.
