Re: The Battle of Irony Ilosther: I agree. A court judgement cannot stop me from loving my wife. It may just be in another way that I can love her, but a stupid paper cannot end my love.
I may hate her for ending a life that I loved, but she will always be my friend that I love. It may die down, it may be even stronger, but we also have a child together. We created him with love and he is pure love. I dont think I can ever stop hoping she will love me the way she used to, but for now, it will be about adjusting to this new type of relationship.
Its just funny how life works. The good lord giveth and he taketh. But he still gave us this life, and I guess I should be happy to have found my true love, even if it was to only spend 11 years of my life as a couple.
Re: The Battle of Irony ChristyM: [quote"> Clearly if she wasn't this important to me, she couldn't have hurt me the way she did[/quote">
That's why they say it's the people that you love the most that have the power to hurt you the most.
I do agree with Lumpy that a lot of it is ego. I know I was so angry with my ex that he could so easily discard me. It hurt so bad knowing I was no longer important to him, especially after 15 years together. When he did come back talking about regrets and how sorry he was, I viewed him in a different light -- I saw him as a different person at that point. It made me feel good to know he had experienced some pain and was also realizing how much he had lost, especially considering how smug and cold he had been when telling me he was leaving for someone else.
Christy
Re: The Battle of Irony mophead123: So are we better off having gone through this? Are we all the more wiser? We know what it takes to have a REAL relationship...I don't know. You could say like anything, relationships take practice. Are we all in the end NOT meant to be with one person for the rest of our lives? IS that too much to ask? Do we change to much to be able to change with our partners?
Maybe there is a bit of ego in it for me. I'm not completely sure. The fact is I never even got a REAL apology. All I got was tears and an "I'm sorry, give me one more chance" when I ambushed her about the affair. She was more shocked and embarrassed than anything else. That wasn't sincere. If she apologized now, I would get some satisfaction from it.
I want to know she's in pain. I want to know she ruined us. She threw us away like a diaper. I want her next relationship to fail miserably so that she realizes what she did. This is not because I wish her ill (maybe just I want her to feel the pain a bit) but more so, she will continue this behavior in the sense that she got away with it. I always wondered if I should have confronted the OM. Supposedly he had no idea about me at all. Thought she was single. She was technically pulling a double affair if you will. Why would anyone with a head on their shoulders want to go into a relationship like that. In the end I backed off, cause I thought, fuck its her life...whatever she wants. I gotta take care of myself. You do what you want. Sometimes I just feel she deserves more than anyone to be all alone, to be punished for her crime rather than rewarded.
