should I? qualt: okay so my wife left me (see a long time ago in a galaxy farfar away in the TELL YOUR STORY HERE BOARD for details) i want her back and for now she wants to be friends until she figures things out. she cheated on me and was doing drugs. I want her back so badly. My question though is this should i seek out another woman, not for anything serious but i feel like i just need someone to hold and maybe kiss just to help with my feelings being unwanted. Is this completely stupid?
Re: should I? sourpuss: you mean someone to just use while you wait for someone else who want to keep you hanging in case her new life doesn't work out?
i understand how you feel, but you should decide first what YOU are doing.
are you waiting? then wait.
are you moving on? then move on.
the limbo thing sucks @ss, let me tell you, but dating BEFORE you have decided whether you are getting divorced will just muddy the waters and give your stbx ammunition to use against you.
stay strong, it get easier.
Re: should I? wowee: wow sourpuss I am just following you all around the boards today agreeing with you.
ditto me for what sourpuss said. It is always nice to have comfort from the opposite sex, but sometimes that can lead to so much more anguish then you even thought. For starters, lets say you go out tonight & find someone to "console" you physically. Then tomorrow your wife calls & says she wants to work it out. do you tell her about the other woman? If you do she might be pissed & call off the reconcilliation. If you don't you are now hiding something from her that will eat away at you. Now, lets take the wife out of the equation, same scenerio you find someone & the next day they are the ones to call. They thought you wanted more, or at least they do now. Now you have a whole new set of problems to deal with. Just get yourself together a little bit first. Once you know if it is over or not with your wife, then worry about dating.
Re: should I? little_sparrow: qualt
I don't think you are in a good place right now. I agree with sourpuss and wowee, you need to decide what you are doing first.
You are going through a lot of pain right now and rightfully so. You are still really young and there is a lot of brightness in your future.
When you are ready to give and much as you take, then you can look for someone else. No one can give you what you can't give yourself.
