Totally Lost brokenhearted: Hi, I'm new to this site but most things I have read may help me in the end but I think the more I get this in the open the more it will help me. My wife and I have been married for 15 years, we have three wonderful kids and we are both in the military. She just returned from her first tour of duty in Afgahnastan. She had an emotional affair with a soldier from another country and she absolutly fell head over heels in love with. We managed to figure things out, so I thought, she sent me an e-mail yesterday saying I'm leaving. Needless to say I was shocked, I have been a wonderfull husband and father to our kids and she was a wonderfull wife and mother. When I came home, she packed her bags and left, her only explaination was that she wanted to be alone. I am shocked, hurt, angry and any other emotion that comes to mind and my three kids are very confused. I made sure they understood that it wsn't their fault but I don't think they understood. So here I write, brokenhearted and alone. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
Re: Totally Lost Bubby: I don't have any answers and it sounds like she might not have any for you right now either.
Do you think she is reeling from the affair? Feeling guilty or unworthy of your family and your love? One of the things I've learned from my separation is that I'm not person I thought I was--I'm capable of causing people pain, even when I wasn't trying. And, I'm capable of hurting more than I ever thought I could. Do you think she might be feeling something like that?
Re: Totally Lost brokenhearted: To be honest I have no idea what she is thinking or feeling and I doubt very much she has a clue herself. I've tried talking to her but I keep hearing the same answer..i don't know
Re: Totally Lost insomnia: it takes a lot for a parent to just pack up and leave their children behind... i dont think she is thinking too clearly right now. give her the space she needs and focus on your children. i know it is hard to be strong right now, but please be strong for them.... you did the right thing telling them that it was nothing they did....
Re: Totally Lost riversandlakes:
the EA might be deeper than we think. Gone with the wind on a business trip - now that's my story too. time is what you need to give, whether willingly or not. May the Lord go with her, for no one else will. When she needs to think, she needs to think.
but she said she wanted to be alone; she didn't say "think". hopefully it implies thinking...
Click More for the next page.
