sleepless down south..... liveandlearn: Hi everyone. I'm back. I came to this board a while back when my marraige ended suddenly one day - ex said he wasn't happy being married, etc. , felt that way for a long time. Never saw it coming - all of my time w/ him was normal as far as I could see. I loved him very much - my heart was broken. Flash forward almost 2 years... He got married - to the one he cheated on me with - yes, there was a reason he left - I just had to find out after the fact... I don't care, don't love him anymore or wish for my life back with him, even though he can't say the same...
I just worked so hard to make sure that I was ready, and ok before I ever would give my heart to someone again. I met a wonderful guy - someone who made me feel alive again. And I know that we both developed some pretty strong feelings for one another... problem is, he's not ready and I can't blame him. He's going thru a divorce too.
But nonetheless, I started to fall for him and I am afraid to walk away from it all because he says when he is ready I will be the one he comes to. I can't put my life on hold though - for something that may never happen, plus I am starting to not trust what he says, and he's done nothing to make me feel that way - it's my old baggage from my divorce that is making me think that...
I am just so sad these days. I was so hopeful but now that hope is gone. I dated between the divorce and this guy, so he's not a rebound and I know that's what he doesn't want me to be for him - he's a sincere wonderful person, but this hurts so much. And I get angry at my ex for ever putting me in this place to begin with.
I just don't understand - why, after all I've been through, can't one thing just work out for me - that's all I ask. I've fallen in love and now I must somehow get him out of my heart before I can move on. But I will miss him so...
Just very sad tonight - and alone. I have a wonderful family and great friends around me, how could I feel so alone despite those facts?
I just pray things will get better. Anyone had this happen to them? I'd love to talk.
Re:sleepless down south..... niceguy: [quote"> I just don't understand - why, after all I've been through, can't one thing just work out for me - that's all I ask. I've fallen in love and now I must somehow get him out of my heart before I can move on[/quote">
I couldn't have said it better! You're not alone on this one. Although the cirumstances are a little different, the theme is the same for me. For me it was the first person after my marriage fell apart. We found each other at a time when I think we both needed someone. She was headed for a divorce as well. One thing for me, my marriage had been falling apart for so long (probably before it even started), so I think I was in a place where I was ready. Unfortunately as it turned out she wasn't yet. This relationship ended awhile ago, but it hasn't been easy to get over. I've dated a few times since then, but ... it's just not the same.
Anyways...I understand what you're going through.
Re:sleepless down south..... wakepner: liveandlearn and niceguy,
You are both in my thoughts and prayers. Please know that good things will happen to you...if I could only listen to my own advice! Remember you are more important than those who you are dating and you HAVE to take care of yourself. Thinking good thoughts...
Re:sleepless down south..... Brian75034: Learning to be alone and happy with oneself while alone is one of the toughest things I had to do.
But, it is all worth it.
There are many little steps you can do if you are willing to listen or try.
Hang tough!
B
Re:sleepless down south..... 18Months: Live and Learn,
See my story under Bigger Mistake than My Marriage...same situation. I feel exactly as you do. I wish I could get a break in the area of love. I date other people now but it isn't the same and my heart hasn't healed from the latest mistake. It has been two months since I was with her and I still miss everyday. It is getting better but slowly. I think it fade with time, just like getting over my marriage. The real concern for me is I thought I hit the jackpot this time...and was still lied too. I'm finding hard to trust my feelings and believe in love or anyone. Hang in there, you are not alone.
18Months
