day 47. seems like yesterday getting_rough: 47 days since I left my husband. Today it feels like it was yesterday. I am not crying today like I have been for the past 4 days. Today I am just sad. I keep wanting to pick up the phone and see when he plans on coming home. Obviously that would confuse the hell out of him since we dont have a home anymore. I wont really talk to him when he calls me because I am trying to be strong and as soon as I know its him on the other line its like this brick wall takes over my soul. I have no control over it I just start being really cold. I think I trained myself to be this way since the day I left. It was the hardest day of my life. I did not want to do it but I knew that I had to I had to learn to hate him so I could stay strong and not let him talk me into coming home. Now its like an automatic reaction to him. I feel really bad when I hang up without saying goodbye. I miss him soo much today. I want to hug him or hold his hand. I would love to lay down on the couch and watch tv with him tonight. GOD I miss him. Oh well just needed to get this out. probly should have used the vent board. sorry.
Re: day 47. seems like yesterday AfterMath: No need for sorrys getting_rough. Day 400+ for me, and once in a great while, I miss my ex wife so much.
Good vent no matter where you posted it. You are strong, and eventually these feelings will become just bittersweet "sighs" once in a while.
Re: day 47. seems like yesterday charmed: Your feelings are normal. When you love someone, the love and good memories don't go away in a day. Sometimes never. You'll have ups and downs, but the ups will prevail eventually.
I wish you much happiness in life and love ;D
`charmed
Re: day 47. seems like yesterday riversandlakes: Day 180+
I sleep almost normally now. Almost feeling (if I dare say so) wholesome again...
A muscular body does that to people, I think? :D
Re: day 47. seems like yesterday Beren: 613 since it all started, 295 since the divorce was final. Finally getting to the point where it really does feel like I'm starting a new chapter, rather than every day being an epilogue to a story about a failed marriage.
Beren
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