Dealing with the reality of the end wpgilbe: I'm not so sure that this is a vent. Not real sure what it is, in fact. My stbx and I have a custody hearing on Friday of this week. Did I want any of this? No, I did not. She made the decision to cheat. She made the decision to split up a family. She made the decision that she would try to leave the state with the children and "give" me visitation. That was the beginning of the fight. Four months, $19,000 in attorney fees, one contested divorce filing later, it all comes down to one hour in front of a judge who doesn't know me, her, or either of our two children. Even after 8 years of marriage, I don't love her anymore. I don't have the slightest of feelings for her. I just miss being a family. My son will start kindergarten tomorrow - his first day of school. And mommy will not be there, because to her, he will be with her soon enough and will "offically" start school elsewhere.
So now, I am faced with a new reality as this draws to a close. I have fought for my children with everything that I have, financially and emotionally. I can rest easy knowing that, and also knowing that someday they will know that. The outcome on Friday will favor me, or it will favor her. Either way is frought with problems. If I win custody, how do I work and juggle the logistics of taking care of a 5 and 3 year old? If I lose custody, I face a much different relationship with my children than I ever imagined. After all of this, I think that I have the strength to deal with the outcome, whatever it is. The unknown, while troublesome, does not bother me the most. What bothers me the most is that she did this. She took a vow and broke it. She had children with me and together we made a commitment to put the children first. She broke that. She had a husband for 8 years that wanted to spend all of his free time doing things with the family, and that just wasn't enough. Her selfishness has impacted so many lives. As this whole sh!tty process ends, I am left wondering why.
Patrick
Re: Dealing with the reality of the end alonewith2: Hope things went well for you.....
Re: Dealing with the reality of the end wpgilbe: Hearing was postoned until 8/25, which means that my son will get to go to school for a few more weeks, which makes it more unlikely that a judge would then let her pull him out and move. It was a minor victory for me, so the saga continues...
My attorney really likes my chances of primary custody in light of everything that has happened.
thanks for all of the support
Patrick
Re: Dealing with the reality of the end ChristyM: Hi Patrick. I logged on to see how the custody hearing went. I'm sure in some ways it's a relief to have it postponed but I'm also sure you were looking towards having an answer. I know this has been tearing you up.
Please keep us posted. We are rooting for you!
Christy
Re: Dealing with the reality of the end Mart: Hi Patrick,
It looks good. Good luck!
Mart
