Mail it or chuck it? mophead123: I was cleaning up my apartment yesterday and stumbled onto more of the ex's things. It stunned me for about 5 seconds but then obviously it was ok. Anyway, we have now been through since April. Quick recap is she asked for time off. Lied, and deceived, and was pursuing the OM (who knew nothing about me) for about 4 months until I found the mails exposing everything including the "I love yous, I miss yous, etc..."
The end was extremely dramatic as I ambushed her with all my knowledge but not before I gave her the chance to come clean. Questioned her on all the things I had answers for and she failed each one. Must have lied to me about 60 times just that night. The ones that stung the most were the "I want to be with you always. I want to have a family with you. I respect you more than anyone in the world." During the time apart I discovered this "friend" she swore to me "You know I would never cheat on you. You know my character." Pretty hysterical.
I ended it on a dime and there has been NC since. I asked her in early June to mail me back a chain that is a family arlum that I have been wearing since I was 13 I gave to her during the "time" period to demonstarte how much I cared for her. She returned it along with a present I gave her for Valentines Day (designer wallet). Pissed the hell out of me. That thing has so many bad vibes attached. If she didn't want it, just through it out. Why did you accept it if you knw say "I cannot accept this. It isn't right." A nice way for her to feel less guilty I guess.
So I have all ofthis crap in my place and I was wondering if I should just dump it, or be a nice guy and try to return it. I don't really feel like meeting her. She never offered to return my stuff either. I just for some reason feel lt's the right thing to do. On the other hand, I don't want to supset the balance which has been well of recently. Last thing I want is to fall back in the hole.
Re: Mail it or chuck it? sourpuss: chuck it. unless you have come across an item (like your heirloom) that is not replacable or has enormous sentimental value, chuck it.
socks, old toothbrushes & christmas cards from co-workers don't count.
Re: Mail it or chuck it? jillieb44: I agree with Sourpuss. Unless you know it has value to her, chuck it. If you think she'd want it, mail it.
Jillie, who still has stuff in the ex's house that I have to get out before he chucks it........
Re: Mail it or chuck it? alonewith2: I agree, chuck it unless you feel it is something she can't possibly do without, but obviously she's been getting along just fine without it.....so it's your call.
Re: Mail it or chuck it? hudson: whatever you do, keep the no-contact going. don't talk to her. do what your conscience tells you to do.
personally, i chuck it, or give it to the salvation army.
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