my child has a horrible issue ashamaliedarn: She throws the most awful fits. In public, at home, she will THROW herself on the floor...scream at the top of her lungs, and kick with all her might, hit herself and anything around her, anyone even. This is NOT something that I've dealt with with her before...until these other friggin kids came into the house....and now it's allllll the time. Sucks. And now it's making me VERY angry...to a point where I want to SPANK her in public when she does it.
How can I put a stop to this WITHOUT becoming an abusive parent or having to get the friggin EX involved....cause Lord Knows he'll turn it into neglect SOMEHOW.
Re: my child has a horrible issue amola: get the other kids out of the house....i know that they aren't disciplined like they should be (from what you've told me) and they just run amuck and get their own way.....she learns from what she sees.
also remember, she's adjusting to a daycare for the first time in her life. she's going to have some issues until she figures out exactly what's going on and why.....everything will be fine, just give it time. don't lose your patience with her, because she really just has no clue what is going on. she knows that her life is changing right now....
be patient, work with her, positive reinforcement, all that stuff......
hang in there.....
Re: my child has a horrible issue WhiskeyGirl: Its just a phase ash, trust me. My middle girl is only now just getting out of it and she is three....I was starting to think she was the devil's spawn for a while but its not so....suddenly she is sweet as pie, its like night and day I tell ya. Like Amola said, if she is just starting a new daycare or something like that....she will act out just from stress. To be honest, I always just completely ignored her when she did it, even if we were in public. I didn't want to reward that behavior with ANY kind of attention at all so I waited until she calmed down....sometimes it would take half an hour....and then I would pick her up and comfort her and see what she wanted. It seemed to make the fits shorter and shorter....she knew it wasn't going to get her anywhere.
Good luck girl, I don't envy you....girls can be very, very stubborn ;) LOL
Re: my child has a horrible issue Shanna: Tantrums happen. There are several ways to handle them. Pretty much depends on the child.
My oldest does best if you just walk out of the room. BUT now that he is a little over three....as soon as he hits the ground I say...YOU MUST BE TIRED if you are acting like that....and he says I WANNA GET UP...bc he knows I am putting him to bed if the tanrums doesn't stop NOW.
The younger one is doing a lot better since I Started just ignoring him until he gets up. We have cut tantrum time from like a 10 minute screaming on floor to about 1 minute then he gets up and comes for a hug.
GOOD LUCK you will need it....patience is a viture LOL
Re: my child has a horrible issue jillieb44: Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Kurcinka is invaluable for getting ideas for tantrums and other intense behaviors.
For me it was a) ignoring it if it weren't bothering others or b) picking up said child without saying a word and leaving the public place to go to the car until the tantrum were finished.
Threats, taking stuff away, etc. rarely works long term. Trying to figure out the cause of the tantrum and helping your child through it (tired, hungry, bored -- fix the cause) by getting food, distraction, nap (driving away), and the like helps more.
Jillie, mom of the premier tantrum thrower...who now has a relatively calm 7 yr old...
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