Re: Darn it! I looked at his photos! skooz: My STBX didn't even care about photos or anything that had to do with our marriage memories. As of this moment I don't think he ever cared at all. What's sad is that I spent the last couple of weeks before the breakup putting all of our wedding pictures in a Scrapbook. I took all those things with me when the house was sold and we moved away. I'm still wondering about what to do with them because there's really no one who will enjoy them since we didn't have children. Someone told me maybe one day I will want to look at them to remember the good times, but right now... I don't know. Bonfire anyone?
Re: Darn it! I looked at his photos! lost in midland: bonfire great idea I had a bonfire one night with all the kids and parents from the area. I was making bbq and getting people drinks all night, going in and out of the house. Each time I did that I saw a small chair made of wood that was hers on the porch. I asked her many times to pick it up and she always said I'll get it some other time. After everyone went home I was cleaning up and I saw the chair again. I fixed myself a big scotch and soda and burned the chair. Sounds silly but it really felt good when she asked about it a few weeks later. I just told her I gave it to someone that wanted it.
Re: Darn it! I looked at his photos! alonewith2: I kept trying to throw away many of our photos.....I kept some for our daughter, but the rest I tried to throw away. Well, he would come over to see our daughter and must be he'd go through the garbage?!! and would find them and then yell at me for doing that. I asked him why he cared, and he said that they were special to him. I didn't get it. He was the one who was content to cheat on me every chance he got and then left me for another woman, why would he care? Eventually, I just boxed everything up and took it to his apartment and told him to keep them then.
Re: Darn it! I looked at his photos! kfc75: Frogster, it sounds like you are doing good, I will be happy when the day comes when I can just look at photos and feel nothing, and just remember the good times with a smile.
The last thing I looked at was a card from the 5th anniversary, saying how much she loved me, and wanted to have many more happy years together, funny how much things can change in less than a year. I felt calm, almost amused by the irony, but after the initial calm it threw me into a massive tailspin, so I know where you are coming from with wondering if the panic is just around the corner.
I have a shoe box in the back of the closet, with special photos, love letters, ticket stubs and so on. I am not sure what I want to do with it yet, I haven't looked in there in a while, but I know last time I did it hurt. Part of me would like to burn the whole thing, but I do need to keep somethings to show my son when he is older, because I know his mom just tossed everything that reminded her of me. I think it might be time for the love letters and cards to go. But the one thing that I would really like is to get her out of my head, I wonder if burning a few letters would help?
Re: Darn it! I looked at his photos! skooz: Burning a few letters won't take her out of your head, that's for sure. Healing takes more than that and I hope you're being wise about it. If I had children I probably would want to keep things, but right now it doesn't make any sense and the truth is that now that I look at them again I feel nothing. No pain, no anger, nothing... Just a big empty space. I don't think panic will set in now or ever, this isn't going to send me to the dumpster, not after all this time. I guess after almost a year it is time to just forget about it.
