Re: What do I do? lonelywithouthim: [quote author=Bubba's Bama Hottie FOREVER link=topic=19543.msg178237#msg178237 date=1128043137">
As far as the original question, just meet up with him and see where it goes. Ya never know! ;)
BBH
[/quote">
Thanks, I think that's what i'm going to do :) It definitely can't hurt at this point and it may end up being something really good ;D
lwh
Re: What do I do? tyrogers: That's right girl! It may end up being something really good! Ya never know! So, I say go for it! Keep me/us updated! I'd love to hear how it goes!
xoxox
BBH
Re: What do I do? hardened_heart1970: the problem i can see with long distance hook ups, is that the person on the other end of the computer, or phone, can be whom ever they want to be. nice as could be, polite, wine and dine...
so you want to meet.. best behavior for a week. does anyone actually know who that long distant person is truely?....no.
what if you like the other, then one moves, then the real person WILL COME out. none of us, or no one is perfect.
so, what happens when it comes out after the move? i have a friend, whos ex wife did this. the guys a lawyer, and suckered her into thinking he would provide everything needed for her and 1 kid. private school etc. guess what? he goes to regular school. is 11 and has to go to bed at 8, cant have a bike....did she know this guy?............nope.
what ever anyone does, do not think that its all fool proof as it is not. we ALL have faults, some more than others, but we all do, and there is one thing i can almost guarentee.................
it will not come out till after your fully together.... but it will....BUT how we deal with it, will make it so we either succedd or fail......
Re: What do I do? hudson: hi lonely.
Well. Bubba,bbh and bjs all make valid points. But the idea is for you to prevent yourself(and this fella) from getting hurt again right? Well, I was in a situation very similar to yours. I met someone on ojar, we exchanged hours upon hours of phone calls, emails etc. And eventually I flew out to see her.
Now, why didn't it work out? Well, I wasn't over my ex for starters! Just as this man you are talking to clearly isn't over his. And maybe you're not really over yours either, i dunno.
Also, you're lonely, he's lonely, hell, we're all lonely and that loneliness can drive us into a relationship that, for all practical purposes, we shouldn't be involved in. Thinking we're ready, feeling at times as though we're ready for a real relationship doesn't mean we are. It takes a hell of a lot of time before we become ready for another real relationship again after a divorce.
Coming out of a painful experience like a divorce and trying to find your way through the complicated world of post-divorce relationships is a daunting task. If you're looking to avoid getting hurt again right away, as you've very clearly indicated you are, I would steer clear of this type of relationship under the current circumstances. This is coming from someone who's been there, done that.
Bjs offered the practical perspective. And practical is good for someone who is healing and trying their hand at re-entering the dating world. Local is good!
Lonelywithouthim, I understand that this guy you're talking to is fills a certain void in your life, he takes away a lot of your loneliness, he makes you feel like you just may be capable of having a real relationship again. But look at the practical, the red flags.
I think that's it. take care.
Re: What do I do? jadedangel: [color=navy"> Jees ... look at all the pessimism around.
I think you should do what you feel is right. What is the worst thing that is going to come of it --- meeting a friend?[/color">
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