The Beginning of the REST of MY Life... KdUb: It's weird....I sit here typing this just two days after I thought my life was over (signed teh "D" papers Friday for those of you who don't know my story) and yet I'm calm, collected, and have this positive attitude. HUH?!?!?! I should be devistated - like I have been throughout this entire ordeal - no?
But it's all about perspective....instead of thinking of this divorce as the END of my life w/ my wife, I CHOOSE to think of this as the BEGINNING of the rest of my life. A chance to reinvent myself, find myself, embrace those things in life that make ME happy. This is MY time. My life. I will be happy. I CHOOSE to be happy. Wow - I FINALLY GET IT! So much of life actually IS a choice.
Choosing this frame of mind has helped me soooooo much. Do I miss my wife? Yes. Would I take her back? No. Not the way she is. I'm worth more than that. I deserve more than that. I know this to be true. You all deserve to be happy too. You deserve to make someone ELSE very happy and I know you will. Soooo many big hearts on this message board. I love you all. Thank you for being there for me. I know I have some hard days coming up but I know I have you all, my friends, my family, and my self respect.
Ok, off my soap box now. Just thought I'd share my feelings with you all this Sunday evening. Hope you all had a great weekend.
Keegan
Re: The Beginning of the REST of MY Life... alfaromeo: I'm happy to see your positive attitude Kd, this board really needs to hear stuff like that!
I wish you the best in your new life, with that attitude your going to be a very happy person ;D
Re: The Beginning of the REST of MY Life... thehitekrednek: Hey kd
Way to go!!!!
Where you are is my biggest goal right now.
Hope I make it soon.
thr
Re: The Beginning of the REST of MY Life... Older Guy: Keegan......excellent positive attitude and i'm sure it will help you work through this.
But don't be surprised in you feel like "3 steps foward, 2 steps back" one day and the next day you feel like "2 steps forward and 3 steps back" and another day "2 steps forward and no steps back". In other words "good days/bad days".
The one word of caution that i would like to mention too is that even thoguh you are keeping a posiitive attitude...please make sure that you allow yourself to feel the pain and your feelings regarding your situation. You'll need to deal with this and get it out of your heart and soul good positive attitude or not. Or it may stay there and possibly affect you, your behaviour and perception in your future rleationships.
good lcuk to you.
OG
Re: The Beginning of the REST of MY Life... KdUb: [quote author=Older Guy link=topic=20106.msg186226#msg186226 date=1128944850">
Keegan......excellent positive attitude and i'm sure it will help you work through this.
But don't be surprised in you feel like "3 steps foward, 2 steps back" one day and the next day you feel like "2 steps forward and 3 steps back" and another day "2 steps forward and no steps back". In other words "good days/bad days".
The one word of caution that i would like to mention too is that even thoguh you are keeping a posiitive attitude...please make sure that you allow yourself to feel the pain and your feelings regarding your situation. You'll need to deal with this and get it out of your heart and soul good positive attitude or not. Or it may stay there and possibly affect you, your behaviour and perception in your future rleationships.
good lcuk to you.
OG
[/quote">
I agree - however, I have given this very subject A LOT of thought recently because I didn't want it to come bite me in the a$$ later on.
I look at it this way....try to follow me on this - EVERYONE.......
You know how we keep talking about the "LEAVER" and the "LEAVEE" here and how typically, the "LEAVER" in a relationship already has one foot out the door and has begun the grieving process LONG before the Leavee ever has a clue??? Well, in my case, my stbx had started checking out about 1 year ago and started dating this old dude (no offense Older Guy ;D) about 6 months ago.
Ok, so that establishes the timeline for my theory. She's had about a year to slowly check herself out of her feelings where I was blindsided about 2 months ago (Aug. 5th) that anything was wrong at all and have only known about the OM since Sept. 16th. Here's the deal - so here I am, on this what I call an accelerated path to acceptance. I went through ALL the emotions on the planet in such a short time frame that I feel I have actually EXCEEDED and PAST her up in the entire process. I've already accepted it, initiated the paperwork, made peace with myself, god, and her, and have now embraced the beginning of the rest of my life.
Where she, on the other hand, is now left 'holding the bag' containing the remains of her previous life w/ me. Now she too may have also moved on but judging from her reaction after signing on Friday - I highly doubt it.
Does this make any sense?
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