Re: The Beginning of the REST of MY Life... ajw: Its gunna be hard,it always is hard to give up on some one you love so much....but whats the other choice,take her back and just completely overlook the fact she's lied,cheated and betrayed you at every turn.You made the hard decision and the reason it was such a hard decision is because it was the right thing to do.
Keep strong
Andy
Re: The Beginning of the REST of MY Life... Irony: KdUb:
Wish I could find the "Emergency Stop " on this roller coaster from hell also.
(you can find my tale of woe here: http://ojar.com/boards/index.php/topic,20409.0.html
I am glad to see that you are dealing with this from such an upbeat mindset. It sure beats the alternative!
Still have those days AND nights where I feellike s*it and I know I will continue to have them for a long time, but today I feel GREAATTT!
Thanks for the uplifting post.
Good luck to you and I hope things work out.
Phil
Re: The Beginning of the REST of MY Life... twobeautifulkids: Hey Keegan (I was going to name my son that at one time!),
Good for you. Power of a positive attitude goes a long way. You'll be stronger and heal faster with thoughts like that! I want to warn you, though, there can be a slide backwards at times. I went on the "move forward" track for months, and recently had a little setback. It sucked. BUT....I'm coming out of it (got the news Saturday, so I guess it's been 5 days....) already so I know that means I am a stronger person than I was 6 months ago! :)
Take care!
Re: The Beginning of the REST of MY Life... Discarded: Congradulations Keegan, I know exactly how you feel. I felt that same way Sept, 1 2004. Keep up the positive attitude and no contact outside of what has to be and the random encouter. You are right that you were on an accelerated program. You have been on that accellerated program since you found out and were attached to the rollercoaster of her decisions. You had to make some very hard decisions to make and didn't let your emotions rule the decisions you had to make. Your emotions had to constantly change to keep pace of the decisions you made.
When you finally got "Officially Divorced" your emotions, mind, ego, and every other part of you were so very ready to get off of the rollercoaster of her life and the decisions that were forced upon you to make.
You are over that relationship, box it up and stay out of the pictures! What you are doing is dragging up something that is dead, quit giving it life support even if it is only for a few minutes or a day!
You will have some bad times ahead, but you have done the major hurdles. You are now on the home stretch and from here on out it is up to you.
Olderguy is right though: You will have some issues that will come up, especially when you start getting into a serious relationship with another woman - nothing seems to bring out the issues like getting into another serious relationship. I worked through those issues as I knew where they were coming from and am still working on one or two of them. If you realize that those issues root from the divorce process and what your X did you can rationally work on those issues without them driving you nuts especially if you make your significant other aware of the issue and to try and work with you on it. You will have some issues after a divorce and being cheated on causing the divorce. Just be prepared for them.
For BJS2005
I can tell you and spare you a whole lot of trouble, but it won't help; you will do it anyway. What the heck I will tell you, The answer to: [color=red"> I have no control over my emotions even though I am totally over her. What I'm not totally over is what happened to us and the way it happened[/color"> . The answer is that you will never know, you will never understand it, and it is just something to let go of and understand that you just won't get it which is where I came up with my sig.
Discarded
Re: The Beginning of the REST of MY Life... KdUb: Thanks to you all.
Discarded - you birng up several good points. Thank you. You're right, there are somethings you just don't, make that WON'T ever understand. You just gotta let em' go.
I guess the toughest part is that our anniversary is tomorrow. What's even tougher and odder than that is, our divorce will be finalized the DAY AFTER! What are the freaking odds!?!?!? :o
Gonna be a rough week......if I let it bother me that is. Gotta get back to that happy place I was at last week!
Thanks for listening.
Keegan
Click More for the next page.
