Re: Rebound relationships? tearsrunoneway: Yeah, all good advice. This kind of came out of nowhere, I was counting on being alone for awhile, but you can't plan these things. I could see myself falling for her, but Im reluctant to give a 100% right now, which isnt fair to either of us. I wish I could have met her a few months from now when I wasnt such a mess.
Re: Rebound relationships? lilly10: Tears does she know you are a mess?? If so Im sure she will respect that and give you a little time and you could still talk to her and get to know her. I have mixed feelings about rebounds I stayed in one 3 years to long once. But that is a whole other topic. I would just be honest about things with her and let it take the coarse it will take. This is good news though!
Re: Rebound relationships? tearsrunoneway: thanks lily...atleast I am thinking about this and not my ex - worse case senario it doesnt work out, but atleast I'll be pre-occupied with other thoughts for once! I don't want to drop my WHOLE recent past on her, or scare her off, but at the same time I want to be honest, so it is a weird position. I"ll probably slowly let her know my situation and go from there. This is the exact thing I was posting on weeks ago about not knowing how to deal with...guess Im about to get a crash course on how to be single again :P
Re: Rebound relationships? sarahbear: I would just like to input my own two cents on the topic of rebound relationships.
As a self-appointed expert in failed relationships, let me say that a rebound relationship is rarely a good thing... but let me explain why.
Forget about your feelings for a second. Think about the person you want to have a "rebound" relationship with. Let's say that you think this person is great, etc. etc. and so you get involved. The next thing you know, YOU realize it was just a rebound relationship, but party X believes it was real. So now you have to figure out how to break it off. You're not in love but they are.... so what kind of situation has this created!?! The very same situation that many of the people on here have experienced.
You would be hurting this person in SOOOO many ways. It's easy to promise yourself that you won't have feelings / can't have feelings... but there's no guarantee (even if you agree in advance that it's a "fling") that this person will not develop feelings for you and then will be SLAMMED when you decide you feel better and move on.
Hopefully I've made my point. I feel the best thing to do is take it slowly. Find an "out" and take it-vent to your therapist, friends, this board--and then go see what happens. =)
Cheers and good luck!
SarahBear
