Childcare issues ... yet again LettinGo: So my mother decides a month and a half ago that she is going to come and stay with me Tues - Fri to help out with the kids so that I don't have to worry about childcare. I can't afford it, and STBX and I were juggling the kids back and forth between us working different shifts, and it wasn't working at all. My mother insisted, even though I was quite hesitant, because she says that because she wasn't there for me as a child when I needed her, at least she can give back to me when I need her now.
6 weeks into it, she tells me that it isn't worth it for her. ???
She then tells me that I have serious problems that I need to address. My daughter asked her if she was going home and my mother replied, "No, why, do you want me to?" and she said yes, and my mother said, "So do I." WTF? My daughter is TWO YEARS OLD. She wasn't trying to be mean and say she didn't want her there, and even if she was - shes 2!!
I have noticed their behaviour going downhill since my mom has been there. I know she is good with them, but for some reason they cling to me even more when I get home from work, and spend a lot of the time crying.
Anyway, I can't afford childcare. And I mean AT ALL. I have to scrape up each month to keep my home.
I will figure something out, again ... sigh. I am so sick of crying at work every day.
Kelly
Re: Childcare issues ... yet again Trillian: Kelly....
I am soooo sorry to hear about this! HOLLY COW....I could not even imagine what I would do if my mom said that to me. WOW!! When I got a divorce from my first ex, I was working 3 12 hr night shifts, 4 PM to 4 AM every tues, wed, thurs night. He was out of town every week working. My mom would go and get my girls from the daycare after work. Then she would go to my apartment, cook dinner, take baths, get them ready for bed and put them to bed. Then she would make a bed on my couch and sleep there. I would get home around 4:30 or 5. She would get up at 6:30 and get ready for work and go to work. I would get back up at 7 and get the girls up and take them to day care so that I coud sleep...so basically I would see my kids all of an hour for 3 or 4 days a week. IT SUCKED!!! But that was what I had to do to support me, my kids and my ex. I would pay my rent, his 2nd mortgage, daycare, food and whatever other expenses without ANY help from him....but some how I scraped by. BUT I know for a fact that had my mother not been there I would be up a creek without a paddle. SERIOUSLY!! And during that time, my youngest daughter was diagnosed with JRA. She would seriuosly only go to three people during the first little while....My mom, me and the babysitter. She would scream any time her dad would even come close to her.
I totally would not know what to do if my mom was not there for me.
I am sooo sorry that you are going through this. I know a couple of single moms in my neighborhood that have the same issue...and they do like a "buddy babysit" thing. Were the ones that are home during the day watch the kids for free or really cheap and then a few nights a week the one that watches the kids during the day take their kids over to the other ones house and they (moms and dads or just the moms) go out for the night. The other one watches them all night and takes all the kids back the next day. Do you think that you could do something like that? Or find a stay at home mom that wouldn't mind watching them for really really cheap?
