Re:A different kind of hangover Safetykc: I resisted the temptation regarding the OM too...IT WAS HARD!!!! GOD IT WAS HARD!
Especially since I worked with my Ex-wife and he worked there too.
I even had to see him on occasion. I struggled with telling him off, calling his wife, all those kinds of things on a daily basis.
While sometimes I regret it because it would have felt good. I have the power and technology too, hee hee...
In the long run the best revenge is to move on and be successful and thats the road I am taking.
But you need to do what you need to do.
Take care Spec.
Safety
Re:A different kind of hangover brynne: Honestly, I think you should cut all ties except when necessary to discuss settlement, things pertaining to the divorce.
My X didn't move out until 4 weeks after the divorce (I had to refinance the house as part of the settlement & he didn't have to move out until he got is $ out). So it was a NIGHTMARE to live in the same house, I was a wreck 24/7. Wondering where he's going, if he's w/ her...torture is what that was like. He moved out in Jan. & the last 4 weeks, while somewhat lonely, at least I have peace in my own home. No nasty name calling, no sneaking around to talk to his g/f. I think that would be the best thing for you in my opinion. Otherwise you will be tempted to question your decision & ponder the "what if's"
Good luck - it's a hard decision to sever ties but it will bring you peace & you'll be on the road to happiness.
Hope
A different kind of hangover ChristyM: I started out wanting to talk to him since we had shared everything together. But as time went on and I forced myself to talk to him less, I realized I didn't have the NEED to talk to him all the time. As a matter of fact, I got strong enough that I finally told him Friday night that it's best we not talk anymore (our divorce should be final in a couple weeks) unless about our daughter. He also cheated on me and I started thinking "Where is my self-respect?" This man cheated on me and still thinks he might be in love with the OW and I still talk to him like his good buddy when he needs me? That's just wrong. I still have to remind myself of that when I catch myself wanting to call. If he doesn't want me as his wife, then he can't just have me any way that benefits him. It wasn't healthy for me. As far as the OW, the best thing you can do is just distance yourself from all of it. If you don't talk to her or him, they will figure you got on with your life and this is the best revenge. I figured, "why waste another minute or tear on him?" It's only affecting me and I'm the only one who can control who and what affects me. You'll be better off in the long run...
Christy
