Ojar in five days pflow3000: My X called me last night...she told me she is has bought some boxes for my stuff and will start bringing them over beginning tonight.
Honestly, I'm so so much better now...I honestly don't really want any of that stuff anymore so if she had decided to throw it all away it would have been fine.
It did strike me when she said she had boxed up my stuff that it was really over.
But what is getting to me the most now...is that finally...she is seeing what she did wrong. Her life is turning upside down. She is admitting her mistakes. So Ive decided that I'm gonna be a better person and help her on her way to fixing her life. But we will do it as separate people.
Just think...just this last Thursay I was at the end of my rope when I looked up depression, divorce and support on Google and found this site. Now I'm on my way to recovery at full-speed. I will struggle just like anyone else but I'm feeling so much better now.
Thank you...EVERYONE HERE!!!!!
Re: Ojar in five days alonewith2: It's great to see you at a peak!! A helpful thing for some of us has been to print out these posts (or save them) so you can refer back to them during any down days you may have.
Re: Ojar in five days pflow3000: Wow...talk about peaks and valleys...
So I saw my X yesterday for about an hour (30 min when she picked up kids and 30 when she left them) and it KILLED me. I was sooo ready to say I was over it but....
I've got those internal chills again and I wish I could just get them out.
Ok...enough of that...I'm DETERMINED that I will turn things around today!!!!! Deep breathe.
Doing the yarkwork this morning hasn't really helped. I guess I'll do some writing. (I decided yesterday that I would start to write a comedy about my life with the X to heal myself a bit...I'm calling it The Mythos of Marie or the Comedy of Marie in kudos to Bill Shakespeare.)
Re: Ojar in five days alonewith2: Are we going to get a sneak peak?!!
Re: Ojar in five days pflow3000: [quote author=alonewith2 (s-n-b) link=topic=21089.msg197661#msg197661 date=1130875471">
Are we going to get a sneak peak?!!
[/quote">
Well...I didn't say I was any good at it... ::)
All I've written so far is the foreword to my little comedy...hopefully I'll have some time to do something for real...
She did hurt me tremendously. Deceit, several affairs, and mental torture will do that to a person. But I'm not a vindictive person. I don't regularly say things that will hurt someone regardless of what they have done to me. I make it a habit of doing the right thing and staying positive in the face of all adversity. But my mind does not conform to the regulations that I have set forth for myself.
I did not tell my mind to conceive this idea of putting the memories of my adventures with Marie in a collective work. Nor could I keep it from laughing hysterically at the decisions that would mold the path of my former spouse. And although my heart may cry and fall to the pommelings of others, my mind...has a mind of it's own.
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