an email from my stbx twetifb: Well, it's been seven week with no contact from the stbx (well except for some drunk vociemails he's left) and then tonight I receive an email from him...
"I was thinking...that it would be nice if we could start communicating/talking and be friends again...
What do you think?"
My response: "that's what i always wanted...
however, it was you who chose to stop talking to me when i decided not to come down to florida to visit you...i don't know if i can handle you choosing when we're talking and when we're not "
Re: an email from my stbx alonewith2: That's strange, isn't it?
I like your response! Did he respond back?
Re: an email from my stbx twetifb: Yes, he did. Just gave me the low down on everything that's been going on with him and his family and the business he started. I responded with a summary of my life thus far. It was hard responding though...I tried to keep emotions out of it. We'll see...I just don't want this to be a daily email thing. I guess we'll see.
Re: an email from my stbx alonewith2: Friendship with my STBX works as long as we do keep the "us" part out of it, but it is hard not to let the feelings come out.
Just last night, my STBX and I got into an argument. He mentioned something about once getting a babysitter for our daughter during one of his weekends with her. I kept questioning him until he admitted that it was so he could go the bar for a few hours. He asked if I would have done the same thing to my son's father....and he was right, I wouldn't have. I let my emotions over "us" get into the conversation.
My relationship with my son's father ended 7 years ago, and we are not friends that talk everyday, etc. I only see or talk to him when he comes over to get my son on his weekend or when I need to call him and ask to switch times, etc. I asked my STBX if that was the kind of relationship he wanted to have, because that may be the only way to keep out our feelings, but he didn't. So it was wrong for me to bring my feelings into, but it was also wrong for him to compare our relationship now to what my relationship is with my son's father.
It's hard, that's for sure. Hopefully, you will have more luck out of it! Sometimes it will help if you take a day to respond back. That way, if he wrote anything that sparked some kind of feeling, you would have that 24 hour wait period to calm down or change your view on it. Good luck!
Re: an email from my stbx twetifb: Thanks alone! We actually talked for about two hours last night. Most of it was basic how's this person and that but then we talked about some concerts he went to (first ones without me). I asked if the band played my favorite song, he said yeah and he sat down and cried for the whole song. There were a few times in the conversation when I cried but it was good...we needed to talk and I know that I feel better this morning. Anyways...we decided that maybe we'll catch up one in a while but it won't be a daily thing. We'll see how it goes.
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