Why do so many people hate being single? doug paul: I am curious why so many people hate the single life so much. Maybe it will hit me soon, but I really don't mind it YET. I'm starting to get a little scared that similar feelings will surface in me. I have been split up from xwife for 7 months and divorce will be final this upcoming Thursday. There are times when I am really sad about the whole situation, but I can't say I think the single life will be terrible. Maybe it's because I don't fell like the bar scene is going to be my thing. I could be in for a rude awakening, but I don't know how doing what you want when you want is a bad thing. Just my two cents...
Re: Why do so many people hate being single? genesplicer: I think part of why some people (myself included) don't really enjoy the single life is because it's so vastly different from the lifestyle we're used to and the lifestyle we wanted (being married).
From some of your previous posts, it seems like you were very aware of the issues going on in your relationship, and that ultimately you were the one who initiated your separation. You've identified things that you couldn't do while you were with your wife, so being single is more of a 'fun' time for you right now.
For others, it's not that same kind of adjustment to a 'fun' lifestyle, but a slow adjustment to being in some foreign country. It will happen eventually (hopefully), but it takes time and effort!
Re: Why do so many people hate being single? Trying2Hope: I think that when it comes down to it, every person is single. We just pretend that being with someone else somehow makes us better.
That, unfortunately, is bullshit. Being with someone just makes life more distracting. It's no different than watching TV. We all just need a way to put our minds on something else.
Having been divorced for a while now, I think my life is not any better and not any worse. I still have problems like I had then. The only difference is that I don't have anyone to have sex with when I get home most nights. (The up-side to that is I don't have anyone to argue with most nights, either.)
Single life, married life. Meh. We all still have the same problems either way.
Re: Why do so many people hate being single? Spectrum: I think the reason many people hate the single life is because they refuse to embrace and accept the situation they are in and improve it.
Being single can do one of two things for you 1) empower you and show you how strong you really are or 2) show you every weakness you posess and leave you on your knees.
At some point, people need to stand up and go after what they want. They need to make *themselves* happy instead of waiting for someone else to do it for them.
Some people take advantage of being single to do the things they've always wanted to do, and make their lives into what they've always wanted them to be. And some people don't.
On the other hand, I will say that dating sucks. I hate dating. If it wasn't for the potential pot of gold, I'd take that rainbow and shove it up someone's a$$. LOL.
Spectrum.
Re: Why do so many people hate being single? RSGinATX: A lot of people have been in relationships most of their lives. They haven't been in a position of relying on their own judgement. Without feedback and reinforcement they feel lost and think the worst about everything, including themselves. One of the reasons its such valuable advice to take time to discover yourself after a breakup...if you're going to be tossed overboard, first thing you need to do is learn to swim.
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