Re: why she had to leave ... Irony: I did a bad thing today.. I emailed wife this:
http://ojar.com/boards/index.php/topic,21578.0.html
added a personal message:
I had a wonderul IM session from a very insightful person about what might have caused the breakdown of our marriage.. not the whole story I'm sure but maybe a big part.
I feel that if I can understand more of your reasons for leaving, I can maybe understand how recognize important issues early on in next relationship. If this applies, it certainly helped me to realize the complex dynamics that you have gone through in taking it upon yourself to decide that it was time for our marriage to be over.
If you feel that this all doesn't apply to you, I apologize. But it hit me that the words put together for me a lot of feelings and intuitions I have had since meeting you and throughout our marriage. Some of it was hard for me to accept.. some of it you may find invasive, knowing how much you value your privacy. It's filled with some cold hard facts that neither accuse or vindicate either of us.. it jsut seems to tell it like it is and explain a lot for me.
I'm sending this along to you in hopes that it may help you find the dianne you are searching for and learn to love and nurture her.. deep down she is a beautiful human being.
I've taken out the names here and just left the meat and potatoes. Hope this helps you as much as it helped me.
Funny, I still love you in spite of your imperfections.
How difficult for me.
and ended with:
Sad thing is Di, I actually love you in spite of knowing your imperfections. Too bad you couldn't have just let that in.
Like I said above, I feel I have nothing to lose at this point. My life is good again and I feel very strong at this point. counselor had some good insights onme and my stuff as wsll . someday I may share them with you if you are at all interested.
I hope you will take in the above in the manner in which it's sent to you.
And again, if this is not where you're at, I aplolgize for the inconvenience.
at the time I figured i had nothing to lose.. now I'm not to sure.
AAAGGHHHH!
I want to walk over to her house and knock on her door..
I want to walk over to her house and knock on her door...
Just shoot me.
Re: why she had to leave ... IlliniGirl: Irony,
I don't think that you sending her that email was a bad thing. I just skimmed over the post, so I don't know the full extent of your problems with her. I think that you voicing your opinion and telling her how you saw/see things was good. My ex never told me anything other than how worthless I was. I think you made a smart move talking to her and telling her how you feel.
I wish you all the best....
IG
Re: why she had to leave ... Irony: [quote author=IlliniGirl link=topic=21578.msg202003#msg202003 date=1131939323">
Irony,
I don't think that you sending her that email was a bad thing. I just skimmed over the post, so I don't know the full extent of your problems with her. I think that you voicing your opinion and telling her how you saw/see things was good. My ex never told me anything other than how worthless I was. I think you made a smart move talking to her and telling her how you feel.
[/quote">
I guess I was just spooked after the fact IG.
We used to communicate so well.. this whole thing has been all consuming..
Was actually better most of the day and things just kinda piled up on me.. sunday niight syndrome.
Saw her onlne and she didn't IM me.
Told me friday she wants a divorce and a bunch of other stuff... she was rambling all over the place.. I guess I was supposed to read between the lines. She sometimes seems to speak in parables.
I know I know... believe only half of what I hear.
I asked her if before we take the finalstep she would be interested in going to a marriage workshop and she declined.
I let it go after that but I guess she thought I pushed pretty hard.
This is all such crazy making.
First time I've wanted to scream today.. hey.. I made it until 10:423 at night without wanting to scream.. see how much better I am today?! ???
AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHH!
Re: why she had to leave ... Falcon554: Yea I ask my wife for 10 hours of her life for MC we get 10 free sessions I got a no on that myself. Stupid selfish bitch.
