Re: talking to others - any regrets? hurting: Well my situation is a bit different. He cheated and I was a mess etc etc. I talked to my whole family and all my friends about what a piece of sh*t he was and how bad he treated me.
Well fast forward awhile and him and I are now back together. My friends think I am nuts for taking him back after what he did. I haven't had the nerve to tell my family yet (they live 6 hrs away)...I am embarrassed, really embarassed now. My family thinks him and I are just friends - they have no idea that he moved back in.
I wish I never told anyone anthing..But I was going absolutely out of my mind and needed to tell people.
Catch 22 situation. You will probably forgive, but friends and family aren't so easy going.
Rebecca
Re: talking to others - any regrets? lexi1012: Well, it happens all the time. Look at Bill and Hilary Clinton! They had the entire world watching them. People do recover from cheating. I recently got in touch with a friend I had years ago. She cheated on her husband while he was away for 6 months with the military. They are still together and working it out. I don't think you should feel embarassed about what other people think. If you feel good with your decisions, that is all that matters. Those that love you just want the best for you.
Re: talking to others - any regrets? lost enigma: I too regret listening to everyone else but him.
Sometimes people mean well, sometimes they dont. Selfish world out there. But a lot of my problems came from what others thought, and i acted out on them.
Listen to your heart and reason with your head (CLICHE I KNOW, KILL ME lATER)
But it's true
Re: talking to others - any regrets? lexi1012: I think that people who have been through similar things are also very quick to judge and force their opinions. I know someone whose husband left her for another woman so, of course, when my husband moved out she said "there has to be someone else". I think when we are hurting and vulnerable we are easily influenced by others and we don't even realize it.
However, there are people who truly can help. I have a really good friend who has really helped and never pushed her opinions. The best support I have gotten from her are lots of laughs!
Re: talking to others - any regrets? techick: I agree with this totally and am so glad that there is a forum like this, to sound off to without having to hear a lot of advice, frankly you can read or not read the replies, though I tend to as I think I am letting myself be lead on, but that's me......:)
lol, I geuss that's the point of this thread! I have my issues and you have yours.
Anyway, yes, I have found that telling others leads to a lot of biased advice as well as, if you do get back together, a lot of hard feelings. So I tend to keep my opinions to myself, at least until things are totally done and then I don't hash it over and over.
And I am in the same situation as Random right now, not telling people that there are probelms and that we are seperated, i'ts tough to keep up BUT I have no idea what's going on with him or me, so there it sits........
Good luck and I found the book It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken to be very helpful, espically with not talkng to friends:)
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