Re: Getting desperate Gabo: Ok. Thanks for all the advice. I will just write a little bit more about how I feel about the whole thing.
I consider myself a strong person. Yes my wounds are still fresh but I have healed quite quickly (in my own personal opinion considering how trashed I felt a month ago). I enjoy being single a lot of time (there is sometime that I miss my ex or get angry with the whole thing, man 6 years is sometimes a lot of time). I’ve been single some times in my life (before X and when we had a 2 year break when we were just “friends”) Most times I enjoyed it but sometimes I felt alone.
Right now I am doing fine. I am still thinking about her but not as frequently or as strong. I returned to classes and continuing my normal life.
Ok. I am a good looking man, and there are some girls that have “hit” on me in the past month. I dated some of them (three) and I decided that I don’t want a rebound. I understand that I am needy and I can not throw myself to the first available arms that pass by. I am actually pretty cool when I am around woman and I don’t show neediness.
The problem started when yesterday I was thinking about my X and then I realized that the part of us human beings that want to be with someone else as a couple is now empty. We all have that part in our selves (well most of us) and when that part is empty, well it sends messages that it needs to be solved (Am I writing this properly or it doesn’t make any sense?)
Anyway, that part of me that says (“Jabe, you need a couple)” is empty. And when I feel that I remember my X (obviously I remember it because it was when that part was let’s say, full) . So I came to a conclusion that only when I’ll find a suitable partner is when those messages of needing a couple and remembering my X will come to an end.
But then I started to freak because I realized that I haven’t met no one who actually suits me. Yes I am attractive to girls but none of those girls have attracted me on a “mmm.. suitable partner level” Then well I started to feel scared that it will never happened and I posted.
I understand your advices. Yes, although I am healing quickly I am still wounded so I should wait a little bit. Yes I know what a rebound is and that is why I haven’t tried to make a move or something like that with the girls I’ve dated so far. Yes I know I don’t have to be needy and I reckon I am not.
Maybe love is only use. We use our partner for happiness, they use us. We use them to share moments, they use us. We use them for support, they use us as well. So maybe love is actually just a use in both directions for happiness. This is just an idea because Sittingbear was talking about using, don’t throw rotten tomatoes at me.
I appreciate all your advices, really, specially those of Sittingbear. I’ll still be around OJAR for receiving and giving my best advices and continue to heal. Hopefully one of those days I’ll find someone who I really like. In the meantime I am cool with being single is just that I know myself and I know that I will always will try to find a partner in life.
Re: Getting desperate Sittingbear: Bravo Bravo to you Sir Jabe..
I read and understood all of your missive...well put, and very optimistic..good one...Your stronger than you think, smarter than you know, and darn it...your cool...
You got a good working mind that is in touch with your heart..proud of you..
sittingbear
jumps up and doesn't throw tomatoes..but flings a bigga pizza at you..hehehhe
