rearranged my bedroom---then: manda: I was feeling so good yesterday because I rearranged my bedroom so I can forget what side I sleep on--dumb, I know.
So HE took son for two hours.
(why not more? I don't know.)
When he dropped him off, he walked him in (remember, my son is 15) and I stayed in my room reading in a rocking chair. HE WALKED ON IN my new room and sits down on the bed. ughhh! (I'm trying to have a no contact thing--he just isn't getting it) So, he said the room looked nice and wondered why I did it. I said, "so I can forget what side I usually sleep on and use the whole bed." He pats the bed, "this is your side." UGHHH, I was trying not to know that.
I know. Change the locks. All that. But with the boy coming and going, he'll still get in.
I'm still hearing that, "I'm coming back soon. I just have some things to work out."
I've said it here a lot. Sorry. But why does he think he can just ignore us for a while and then come back? I find it insulting. And I think I don't like him. I love him. But I don't think I like the selfish brat.
Re: rearranged my bedroom---then: techick: OMG Random!
I know just how that is!!!!
My XBF keeps just popping up out of nowhere to "talk" to me and it's really ticking me off as I get on a path to moving on with my life and there the little jerk is, giving me hope!
I did the bedroom thing too, though there weren't many ways to set it up without leaving "his side" open and making me feel bad everynight when I go to bed that there's no one to crawl in on "his side", but I did get to sleeping in the middle of the bed pretty early on, that makes it feel a lot less empty.
I really don't know what to tell you about all this...frankly I am posting because it's so similar to my own situation that I guess I just had to share that!
And the line about "But why does he think he can just ignore us for a while and then come back? I find it insulting. And I think I don't like him. I love him. But I don't think I like the selfish brat." is my XBF to a tee:( He thinks that I am waiting here for him and that I will until he feels it's ok to come back...he wont' tell me that we are going to be together, but he WILL say that he is staying away until my custody is through court...but he won't let me help in this decisioin, tells me to "go along with it"...sheesh!!! What a jerk! I mean I find that insulting, that I am to just wait for HIM to figure it out, like I can't on my own AND like I don't have a SAY in this, like I am just going to sit here and when he renders his verdict that I fall in line and follow his great wisdom! I guess your H is this same way, he needs to figure things out and then you will be there, just waiting for the verdict, falling into line with whatever he feels is best for all of you...grrr!!!
K, well I guess that made some sense!
You aren't alone Random <hugs>
Re: rearranged my bedroom---then: hardened_heart1970: rearranging the bedroom is a great start. it shows him, that you can, and will make choice on your own, because he doesnt think you can probably..
want to really mess them up? turn pictures of him around (lol)
do something for yourself. he may need to bring your son home, but he chose to leave the home, so he shouldnt have free reign still.
your on the right path. atleast you know you still love him. its very easy to not like someone too...
you have a great start to knowing who you are, and who you want to be, so just keep up the good work. your heart will guide you. let your head make some decisions too....
good luck...........
Re: rearranged my bedroom---then: manda: [quote author=techick link=topic=22103.msg205828#msg205828 date=1133103043">
I really don't know what to tell you about all this...frankly I am posting because it's so similar to my own situation that I guess I just had to share that!
You aren't alone Random <hugs>
[/quote">
That is why this place rocks for support! Many different views and some very similar ones!
[quote author=goose tape man link=topic=22103.msg205832#msg205832 date=1133103838">
rearranging the bedroom is a great start. it shows him, that you can, and will make choice on your own, because he doesnt think you can probably..
[/quote">
yeah, but he didn't think anything of it. Just, "hey this is nice" like he's going to enjoy it someday. ugghh...oh well, I didn't do it for his reaction.
[quote author=goose tape man link=topic=22103.msg205832#msg205832 date=1133103838">
your heart will guide you. let your head make some decisions too....
[/quote">
i like that.
By they way, nice signature line...do you drive a bus?
Re: rearranged my bedroom---then: Falcon554: [quote author=random link=topic=22103.msg205823#msg205823 date=1133101336">
I was feeling so good yesterday because I rearranged my bedroom so I can forget what side I sleep on--dumb, I know.
So HE took son for two hours.
(why not more? I don't know.)
When he dropped him off, he walked him in (remember, my son is 15) and I stayed in my room reading in a rocking chair. HE WALKED ON IN my new room and sits down on the bed. ughhh! (I'm trying to have a no contact thing--he just isn't getting it) So, he said the room looked nice and wondered why I did it. I said, "so I can forget what side I usually sleep on and use the whole bed." He pats the bed, "this is your side." UGHHH, I was trying not to know that.
I know. Change the locks. All that. But with the boy coming and going, he'll still get in.
I'm still hearing that, "I'm coming back soon. I just have some things to work out."
I've said it here a lot. Sorry. But why does he think he can just ignore us for a while and then come back? I find it insulting. And I think I don't like him. I love him. But I don't think I like the selfish brat.
[/quote">
I dont like my wife right now either, but I do love her, go figure. Whatever my wife is going thru now, I can either just go on with my life and hope she comes out of this crazyness or just try to find someone else. Who knows whats going to happen. But it seems everytime I try to pull away it kills her.
She seems to want me to approve of everthing she does. Its soooooooooo freaking weird!!
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