Update BONILLAK: Just popping in to say hello to my fellow Ojars and give you all a little update. I haven't vanished but I got a job! I am driving a school bus, best part is I love it and can take my kids with me. Get my first paycheck tomorrow! I depended on my stbxh for 17yrs and never thought I could do anything but I passed the cdl written test, the health physical and then the road test. I haven't even told stbxh I'm working because he will then mess with me with support monies and since nothing is being garnished yet I'm staying hush. It a big adjustment to getting up at 5:15am with kids but I have been getting clothes, lunches, backpacks, etc all ready the night before, so we just get up, get dressed, eat, and a few other things and we are ready. I don't have any major daycare expense just after school care for my middle child. I am exhausted by the end of the night but I feel good. I had 2 dates this week. One with a police officer I met online but then realized I see him about 4 times a week in a local store and one with my "friend". Stbxh never surfaced for our daughters Bday which sucked for her, well, he did call and ask to take her out in my van and I said Nope. I just had to spend $1500 on van repairs and he wouldn't help so nope. He called me every name in the book and told me I just want him to have nothing and be penniless for life. My response was, you left so you must pay. I told him that he should use the car of the of the girl he left his family for or borrow his brothers. I also told him even if he gets access to a vehicle that he will not take the kids from my presence until I have a number and address of his whereabouts as he has been too nasty lately and God forbid something happened I wouldn't even know where to begin looking for my kids. I told him these 3 months since he has been gone I bent over backwards trying to get him to spend time with his kids, asked him to babysit so I could get dental/medical stuff done, he refused, asked him to help out with Xmas decorations, asked him to go to school conferences, etc and he always refused well now I'm refusing to allow him to walk all over me. He decided to leave his family, his car, his life here and now he must pay the consequences. I also told him I don't want to hear him crying the blues, go cry to his new woman and family. I told him I have been more then nice after what he did for the sake of my kids but I also won't allow him to make me anymore of a fool than he has. If he has no means of seeing the kids or refuses to give an address so they can go to his new home then so be it. I'm not begging him to be involved anymore. Its hurts to have to be the bad guy but shit he made his bed and the kids will see him for whatever he choses to be. This phone arguement occured on Sunday evening and he hasn't called since. Well, thats my life with the kids and I for now. Xmas will be a sad day for the kids but Santa will and has managed to get everything they have asked for with the exception that our 9yr old says she wishes her Dad would come back and act like he use to. I surely don't want him back but the kids need their Dad. Xmas miracle do happen and I hope for the kids he wises up and comes to his senses. I think his yelling at me on Sunday was because he missed her Bday and her party so I can hardly imagine what I'll hear after Xmas!
Re: Update ChiefWiggum: Congratulations on the job, the dates and the happiness! I'm jealous!
