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The Chris Rock divorce handbook

The Chris Rock divorce handbook Dont-want-one: Saw this on comedy central a few months ago and found the transcripts on the website.  Hope you call find some humor in it. 

 Chris Rock: When it's time to get a divorce, women got it made. You go to court, start talkin' that sh?t. "I'm used to this, I'm used to that. I'm accustomed to this." What the f?ck is accustomed? Whats that got to do with shit? You go to a restaurant, you accustomed to eatin'. You leave, you ain't eatin' no more. They don't owe you a steak. What about what the man's used to? It might not be money, but during the course of a relationship, a man grows accustomed to a few things. I would love to see a man go to court and say, "Your honor, check this out. I'm accustomed to f?ckin' her four times a week. Now I feel I should be able to f?ck her at least twice a week. I mean she can have the alimony, but I want some p?ssy payments."

 Chris Rock: Everybody need a pre-nup. People think you gotta be rich to get a pre-nup. You got twenty million and your wife wants ten, big deal, you ain't starvin'! But if you got thirty thousand, and your wife wants fifteen, you might have to kill her!

 Chris Rock: So you gotta think about OJ's situation. 25,000 a month, another man drivin' his car, f?ckin' his wife, and a house he's still payin' a mortgage on. Now, I'm not sayin' he should have killed her, but I understand.

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