Sad For My 4 Year Old Daughter audi_driver: I sit here now watching my angel sleep. She looks so peaceful.
My heart is broken. My heart is broken over shattered dreams. My heart is broken over the fact that I will never be able to raise my daughter under one roof. My heart is broken over the fact that I am not there to sing her the song I sang to her every night before she went to sleep. My heart is broken over the fact that my daughter wants her father there EVERYDAY but I have gone back on a promise to her.
My heart is broken over the fact that no matter what I do to make things better my wife has a closed mind. My heart is broken that my daughter is the one who will suffer......NO MATTER WHAT MOMMY SAYS!!! My heart is broken because I love my wife and daughter more than anything in the world.
So what if I am not perfect? So what if I don't know the answers to everything? So what if I am slow to change? So what if I made mistake?
All I know is that I am trying!! Trying to be a good father! Trying to work on issues with TWO counselors! Trying by starting my own company! Trying by reaching out! Trying by being honest!
How can you possibly not try to work things out? How can you walk away with no counseling? How can you take SOOOO much away from our little girl? How can you take so much away from me?
I live in a world of regret, sorrow. pain, confusion and things not said.
I live in a world where I have heart problems and can not take much more of this pain. My heart hurts as is and the pain of this seperation is only complicating things.
How can mommy walk away when our little daughter cries for daddy and holds on tight no matter where we are because she doesn't want me to leave her.
Re: Sad For My 4 Year Old Daughter Peaceandquiet: Audi I can't tell you how many times I asked that over and over and over again..Nothing in the world made sense, I tried and tried to figure out how my ex could do the same thing..walk away from me and hurt my children...take away their father. One day I just stopped asking, put it aside and just took care of my children the best I could when they were with me. The worst days of my life were were every other Sunday when they would have to go to the ex for her week. It killed me. I would sometimes stand outside their doors on that Saturday night and watch them sleep, hoping that I could just gather them in to my mind, enough that it would hold me till the neek Sunday.
Having done this now for a little over a year and a half, I've learned that the kids have come to accept it. Not like it, but accept it. I have to...to an extent. I have learned that this is the way my life is and unless something drastic happens, this is the way it will remain. So I try to enjoy the children as much as I can when they are with me, and take the good times we have and let my memory replay them when they are not here. It sucks and its not fair, but its the hand we have been delt, and if I have no other cards left in my hand but my children...I still win. Enjoy the time you have with your daughter, thats all I can really tell you. The emotions of the divorce will fade but the love of your child will always be there.
Re: Sad For My 4 Year Old Daughter audi_driver: Thanks for your response...>What worries me is me....
My parents divorced when I was 5. I saw my dad for another 8 or 9 years every other weekend. So why did I stop seeing him around age 14 and not talk to him for 13 years? Well, I got a life.....I played sports. I had friends. I didn't want to miss out of my childhood.
So this is my fear. I fear my daughter and I growing apart. Not because I stop being a father but because her life gets so complicated that DADDY interferes with her routine.....her life....
Re: Sad For My 4 Year Old Daughter Peaceandquiet: Well something more must have happened for you not to have spoken to him for that long I would think. My parents also split when I was around 6 or 7. I did the every other weekend thing and even as I got older I still went and visited my Dad pretty often even though he was four hours away, why? Because he was a great dad... So that's all you can do..is be a great father and your child will always be around, may not be as much as you or I would like, but I would like to think that we are always in their hearts even when they get to busy for us... Cats in Cradle comes to mind.
Re: Sad For My 4 Year Old Daughter audi_driver: I hope and pray that you are right......
She is my world.......
Click More for the next page.
