Re:WEDDINGS... bit pusher: [quote author=Snoopy link=board=20;threadid=2522;start=0#msg21736 date=1080587098">
One thing that I forgot to mention is the obvious awkwardness being at the wedding uncovered--that I was there to celebrate the very exact thing that is tearing me apart...so weird. [/quote">
Yeah, I've had an odd time with that sort of thing ... hard not to look at a good buddy getting married and think "in three or four years, you're going to be passed out on my couch after a binge 'cause she tossed you over for something new."
But I'm trying to stop projecting my own life onto other people -- or my ex wife onto other women -- it takes a conscious effort when things like weddings pop up, or even when someone I know starts dating seriously, but it is good to ... heh ... divorce my own experience from that of those around me. Keeps me on my toes, at least.
-bp
Re:WEDDINGS... Lumpy: Gods I'm such a tech tard. Can't for the life of me get the qoute feature to work properly! Guess I'll have to do this the old-fashioned way. "Last time I checked, you're not exactly part of some fringe minority if you're divorced. Last time I checked, you're not contagious." The rest of the statement bears repeating but I'm also a Typing tard! Thank you bp, dauntless defender of the downtrodden divorced! Been feeling like a pariah among my married friends of late. Don't get it! Not once have I disparaged the institution. I'm not going to poison your marriage with my very presence. That having been said I do think some people do attach a stigma to "I'm divorced". Used to be so proud to say "I'm married with two kids". There seems to be an unspoken sense of pride and accomplishment there. "I'm divorced", feels tinged with failure and rejection. We should be proud of our scars. Thanks again bp!
Re:WEDDINGS... bit pusher: Yeah, people can attach whatever stigma they want to "I'm divorced." If that's enough to shock them, they're not going to last two minutes in conversation with me anyway, so it's all for the best ...
-bp
Re:WEDDINGS... Lumpy: Yeah I agree for the most part. With the "married friends" it almost seems like a subconcious reaction so it's kinda tough to deal with. Wonder how much of it is in my own head. Normally I don't give a hairy rats' ass what people think but with friends it's different obviously. Get the impression that couples are talking about me after I've left the room.
