Re: The person who leaves, do they ever come back or are we kidding ourselves rhhope: Yeah I am going to start going to counseling. I guess what bothers me the most is she didn't shed any tears. She keeps telling me that she loves me but she doesn't want to have anything to do with me. It is like she just doesn't care. For example - her mother is extremely ill and has been in the hospital for 3 weeks. The night her mother got sick, her mother called me to take her to the hospital because she couldn't find my wife. I stayed with her mother all night long in the hospital. THe whole time I was sitting with her mother she kept telling me she doesn't know what is wrong with her daughter. How out of all the men in her life you loved her the most and not only taken care of her but us(her family) I swear I am so sick of being a nice guy. I mean my wife doesn't know how much I love her and her family. I think I am to the point where I am just being a sucker and that my kindness has been taken advantange of.
Re: The person who leaves, do they ever come back or are we kidding ourselves sosad05: I was the leaver. I left him several times before but repeatedly accepted him back. At this point, I will never go back to him. Nor, would I take him back. I think he knew this was the final time to because he never tried to get me to take him back. We had a destructive, unhealthy relationship. We caused more harm being together than now that we are apart. I know for myself I am a better person now without him. I would like to believe that he is to. It took me being away from him with no contact to finally realize we were better off apart.
Ultimately, I think it depends on the relationship and what issues are at hand. I think I tried to work things out with him a million times but we always fell back into the same abusive patterns. We tried counseling. We tried taking trips back to where we had our honeymoon. Nothing worked. I was the giver and he was the taker and I had nothing left to give.
It hurts deeply that our marriage failed. But, I know now our divorce was for the best.
Re: The person who leaves, do they ever come back or are we kidding ourselves Jaimjaim: I say don't close the door just yet either, however do not just sit around and wait. Live your life as best as you can. I'm still going through hell with my ex leaving me. His family loves me and wishes he would get his head out of his a**, and come back. But that has to be his decision. He too needed "time" to figure things out. Since the breakup, I have gotten a promotion at work, am looking to buy my own house, and am planning on starting graduate school for my master's degree soon. When he makes up his little mind, I'll either be with someone else or I might still be willing to give us another shot. I begged for him to give us another chance, but he said he couldn't right now. I don't know what the future holds, but I'm sick and tired of living with the fact that I loved him with everything I had in me, yet we have 3 "bad" months and he just canned the entire relationship because he "got scared." I cannot say whether yours will come back or not, but if so I would be guarded for a while. It takes time to rebuild trust and you don't want to hand over your heart so that it can just be broken and handed back to you in a million pieces again. You are not wrong to still be in love and you are not wrong to want to mend the relationship so do not think you are "weak". I wish you the best though!
Re: The person who leaves, do they ever come back or are we kidding ourselves gulfcoast: Left came back
left came back
left came back
left came back
left,
I'll have to get back with you on it if she tries...lol
