Starting Over/New To Message Board Free2BMe: Hi everyone! Looks like I have found the perfect web site.
My husband walked out on me for the fourth time on February 23. I came home from work and he was gone. Three days later I found out that the mortgage hadnt been paid in three months and all bills were past due. The fourth day I found out about his long term affair with our 54 year old neighbor. Things snow balled after that and a very bad depression set in. I couldnt sleep, eat and I felt my ability to think straight lesson everyday. On March 3, 2004 I hit bottom and took an overdose of tylenol p.m. I am a medical miracle. I survived and when I opened up my eyes... my new life began. I was released from the hospital and told the best thing I needed was REST. So my brother took me home with him to Michigan. 1,000 miles away. Ive learned alot in a very short time that seems like an enternity. I read Sermon on The Mount and I would encourage all to read it especially if you are going through a tough time. I just came back home yesterday and I came back a new person.. or the person I used to be before I got bogged down with a husband that could not face responsibility. But I am not a complete victom.. I always took him back.. But this time is different. Well now I am at the ATTORNEY point... needless to say he has talked about me the whole time I was away... he has temp. custody of our children due to the fact that I needed to go away for a few weeks. I talked and continue to talk to them on a regular basis. I can not change what I did. BUt the people that know me know thiswas very out of character for me. I am now in the process of a very nasty custody battle due to this incident. I am lucky that my mother in law and brother in law are both testifying on my behalf. I have been married almost 10 years. I thought it might be a good idea to go ahead and cancel that VEGAS trip I had planned for our 10th anniversary! But I have learned to love myself enough to place only positive people in my life. I quit drinking .... and I have made good choices. The power of prayer is wonderful. I hope if you are out there and you feel as desperate and alone as I did that you will reconsider doing something terrible. I have put my family through alot of heartach. But we cant change yesterday... cant worry about tomorrow... but live in the present. Ive learned that when I pray to God to bless me he does not always bless me with what I ask for.. but he blesses me with what he feels is best for me. We cant grow if we dont have road blocks. But I know how precious and wonderful life can be now when you trust in a higher power.. because there are not too many people you can trust while you are going through a horrible divorce. Friends scatter.... friends betray and theres always those "friends" that love to tell you details of what they know. Those are the people I choose to stay away from. It is better to walk alone than to walk in bad company.. but with God as your guide.. you are never walking alone.
