Re:When you Just Know in_search_of: And I have a livejournal as well, I don't keep much in it, as I keep another journal on another message board...but it is http://www.livejournal.com/users/xinxsearchxof/
Re:When you Just Know in_search_of: I keep finding myself attracted to the wrong kind of guys lately...either they have the same traits as my ex, or they are totally the opposite and end up just being asses. My ex was a nice guy with a total lack of ambition. Grrrrrr....I hate this about myself, I just want a nice guy who can carry on a good conversation...is that too much to ask.
Re:When you Just Know Basset: Dear In_Search_of,
I see that we have something in common - we both got married at an early age. I have read in a human development textbook that people who get married at an early age don't work out because while they were getting married, they were still searching for an identity. After a few years, they are different people and are not suitable for their partners.
Sometimes I don't blame my husband for dumping me. We got married at a very young age. He used to be this intelligent young man studying in GA Tech, never smoked, and was monogamous. Finally, he turned out to be someone who doesn't want to go to university, started smoking and wanted to be polyamorous. He has changed! ::)
You are very lucky to have a good friendship with your ex-husband. My husband and I can't be friends because he always thinks I hate him, which I don't. He accuses me of all kinds of things and he has been treating me in ways that are nasty. I have a new boyfriend now and he is always concerned about what my husband would do to me.
Basset
Re:When you Just Know in_search_of: Basset,
You know, when I got married, I knew that stuff when I got married psych was my minor, and I had that in lots of different classes that I had.
I am lucky to be good friends with my ex, and on top of that, he cares deeply for me regardless of whether or not we are married, even to the point where he has said that he helps me out whenever I need it. I don't take advantage of it, but his concerns are that I am able to make ends meet and be able to be comfortable. He is a great guy, I wish on lots of different days that we had been able to make it work. There are lots of times when I miss him.
Unlike you, though my ex was not really the one who changed, in fact he never changed. I was the one who changed, I thought I was doing what was best for us...I went to school, I worked my ass off, I did all the things that I thought were the best for us. Well, those things specifically did not end our marriage, all the other changes in me that came with it (including all the new friends I made, and people that I knew) were the things that ended it.
I apologize to him in my head quite often...
Re:When you Just Know Basset: Dear in_search_of,
I have changed a lot too. I know I have become a way better person because of my husband and I thank him everyday for it. I know I would have done everything (including marrying him) all over again to be where I am today. The sad thing is, I don't know if he would he thank me for having everything he has today.
My husband was nice to me when we first broke up. He came by to make sure I had money and I was okay - despite having a restraining order to stay away. But suddenly, he went out of his mind and psychologically hurt me on March 25th. I was very traumatized. Ever since, my boyfriend has been protective of me and the police too.
We just say my husband has Bipolar II - that is why he act weird.
Basset
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