Re:Want to introduce myself and tell my story! Ryan_Clone: Thanks so much!
I know I handled things poorly before/during/after the affair. So many thing I wish I could go back and change. So many things I would do different if I could, but thus is life.
I know without a shadow of a doubt the next person I become serious with will be treated like a queen from day one til the day it is no more. I hate myself for the way I treated my ex wife.
We have no kids thankfully, but sometimes I wish we did just so I could see her now and again. Right now it feels as if she has moved on (rightfully so) and that hurts so much. It's been two months and I am starting to heal, although I wish I could still know the things I would have known as we grew old together. I hate the fact that it seems as if I no longer am even allive to her.
I do wish her luck, and hope she finds a man that treats her well. (although sometimes I hope she finds one that hurts her more than I did, so she can see I wasn't all bad.)
Everything happens for a reason, and everyone has that special someone made just for them. Not everyone is lucky enough to find that person ever in thier lives. I just hope and pray I didn't find mine and ruin it.
Re:Want to introduce myself and tell my story! Basset: Dear Ryan_Clone,
I admire you for admitting your mistakes. I just wish my husband would dare do so. I know just a simple "sorry" from him would take away a lot of pain. Have you said sorry to your ex-wife?
Basset
Re:Want to introduce myself and tell my story! Ryan_Clone: Basset,
Yes I've told my ex wife how sorry I am a million times. All to no avail. What I did has no excuse, and I understand her for leaving.
You have many choices in your lifetime, sometime you make the right one, sometimes you make a bad one. I know without a shadow of a doubt I made the bad one, but I know I will learn from the bad ones, and turn them all into good ones in the future.
Life is too short.
Re:Want to introduce myself and tell my story! Basset: Dear Ryan Clone,
I think we all make mistakes. I admire you because you are willing to admit them and even say "sorry" to your wife. That makes you way better than many other men out there who can't say sorry.
Basset
Re:Want to introduce myself and tell my story! Raven: Ryan,
Welcome to O_Jar.
I think that you are very courageous for coming here, and opening yourself up the way you are. As a cheat-ee, I can tell you that seeing you do this is actually giving me hope that someday(though it will be too late for us) my stbx might come to TRULY realize the damage that he has done, and all that he has lost in the name of "greener grass". In my case, I know I can survive this, and I see a potential for a lot of MY OWN happiness without my stbx...but I worry for my son...He doesn't understand why his Daddy is gone...and when he(my son) finds out that there is another woman in the picture, it is going to be all the more difficult for my child. (Especially since I can almost guarantee that stbx's new "relationship" will NOT last.)
I want to say thankyou, for coming here and saying the things that you have. I applaud you for taking responsibility for your actions, and recognizing your mistakes...(Too many, even if they do recognize them, don't acknowledge them outloud.)
Welcome to the boards!
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