Codependant No More gabby26: MY theapist recomended that I read this book.
awesome is all I have to say. if you have been or are married to anyone with addiction issues, this is a must read. It really turned on some lights for me.
Hope you enjoy
Re: Codependant No More catherine: This book was my first eye opening experience into my last relationship.
Codependency can mean living with anyone who requires that you live THEIR life and not your own. I recognized myself immediately in her descriptions of a codependent (which she defines as "people who have let another person's behavior affect him or her, and who is obsessed with controlling that person's behavior"), sometimes painfully so. I had to put the book down a time or two, because it could be brutal at times but often the truth hurts.
Although I just recently finished reading this book, I am looking forward to applying my newfound knowledge and the confidence acquired from it in oncoming life situations. This will definitely be one of those books that I will reread whenever I need to take a reality check and think of ME instead of that other person.
Re: Codependant No More gabby26: I just finished reading this book.
I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. One that I have been putting on myself for years. The only person you can control is yourself. You can't spend all your time energy focusing on fixing someone. The only one who can fix their problems, is them. And they have to want to do it first. YOu can't make them. No matter how much you worry, or cry, or hold out hope.
Set yourself free. Take care of yourself.
THis book was awesome. I feel like handing out copies to everyone I know with relationship issues. But there I go caretaking again.
Re: Codependant No More flyaway: [quote author=gabby26 link=topic=26030.msg249330#msg249330 date=1141107201">
I just finished reading this book.
I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. One that I have been putting on myself for years. The only person you can control is yourself. You can't spend all your time energy focusing on fixing someone. The only one who can fix their problems, is them. And they have to want to do it first. YOu can't make them. No matter how much you worry, or cry, or hold out hope.
Set yourself free. Take care of yourself.
THis book was awesome. I feel like handing out copies to everyone I know with relationship issues. But there I go caretaking again.
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gabby, this book was awesome. Tough to swallow at times, but good. I know that I was difficult to live with, and part of that was the control thing that I felt like I had to do ALL the time. It is liberating to use the principles laid out in the book in all my relationships, even the one with my mother. She is not addicted, however this book is so good at hammering home the point that I am responsible for my reactions to things and nothing else. It has revolutionized my ability to relate to others.
Fly girl
Re: Codependant No More sudboy: [quote author=gabby26 link=topic=26030.msg248153#msg248153 date=1140808730">
if you have been or are married to anyone with addiction issues, this is a must read.
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I'm still only half way through this one, and I'd suggest that even if your relationship lacked addiction issues it's still a good self-help book.
My only problem with the book is that Beatty's definition of co-dependent would have you believe that most anyone fits into the category.
Sudboy
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