Re: Question to those who have full custody... sosad05: Thanks guys....I'm doing better now. Half the problem was I had an online exam I needed to take tonight and they were being EXTRA naughty. But, we do have a SET bedtime of 8pm and infact we start baths at 7:30. I was feeling very overwhelmed tonight and irritated because HIS life is so easy. He deals with them maybe once a week and OW or his parents help him.
Thanks again!!!
Re: Question to those who have full custody... treeluva: As a single military parent of 2, ( 7 and 4) and I know the stresses of trying to do everything at once. I have my work, (which is NOT ROUTINE!) and my schooling (I dont want to be in the Army forever) their schooling, girl scouts, my unit Family Readiness Group positions, plus everything with the house.
I suggest the parenting class LOVE AND LOGIC. You can google it and read up on it, it really was a life saver for me.
Bed times were always hard for us, heck some nights they are still rough. Getting my children to do ANYTHING was always a problem. My 4 year old was throwing temper tantrums at everything, and wouldnt even pick up her own fork to feed herself. Finally, I just had enough. I told her, "you dont want to feel yourself? You wont eat." She didnt eat for two days. I felt like a horrible parent, but I couldnt continue to enable her to act that way. She figured out that I meant business, and got on with it. Now, all I have to say, usually, is "how sad" and they get the picture.
Re: Question to those who have full custody... resengen: My ex wont let me take my daughter more often. She is the custodial parent. I only get her on Sat and Sunday but never over night. My stbxW doesnt feel i am responsible enough for this. But our lawyers are fighting this out. I would love to have her more and put her to sleep and be more involved in her life. When ever I have a day off from work or on vacation I get her during the week. I would gladly take the responsibility if she would let me have it. Guess i am a bad father in her eyes. >:(
Re: Question to those who have full custody... sosad05: Resengen...I am sorry to hear that. It makes me sad when I hear about dads who want to be involved and arent allowed the opportunity. He could call me anyday of the week and want to see them and I would let him. My children do stay overnight with him once a week....Sat nights because thats when I work. It actually works out very well for us. At first it was hard for me to let them go...it was hard because I knew another woman was taking care of them. But, I had to refocus and consider at least they were getting to spend time with him. Also, it gave me an opportunity to go to work and not have to worry about babysitting expenses.
Keep fighting...I hope you do get the opportunity to spend more time with your daughter. You are a GOOD dad! :)
Re: Question to those who have full custody... yella: Wow... I think we live the same life. My kids are 7 and almost 4, so I know exactly what you're going through.
Mine see their dad 12 hours a month, when he's not away for the weekend, or on vacation, so the pressure here is completely normal.
It's tough being a single parent and living multiple lives. I understand that.
I think a strict routine is best. Home, homework, bath, one TV show, and bed. The quieter and darker you make the house, the better. It sets a calm environment, which has helped me in so many ways. They look forward to that quiet time we have at night, and I'm proud of that. ;) I rarely have issues getting them to bed.
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