Re: Status on the OW sheydp: Trouble is, he is using SUBTLE ways to get what he wants, so you don't challenge him on the big issues. If he said, straightforward "honey, I love you, I made a mistake, please can we work this out?" You would get the opportunity to say - what about her, what about the lies, what about counseling, what about what you did to me... All things he would have trouble facing. If you let him back in - even temporarily physically, you would still have those questions, but how would you bring it up? How would you force him to face it? He could just say - I never meant to get back together... was just horny.
If you feel yourself caving - act as if he just finished saying what is in parenthesis. Tell him "seems to me you are looking for a way back into our relationship. So tell me - is that true? What about...." My guess is he won't want it addressed directly and will back off - which will hurt - but it would hurt less than later. If he says he wants back - be clear with your hurt, demands, and self-respect. You are worth more than just letting him back in. You really are.
Shey
Re: Status on the OW 2be: I agree with the others, that now the OW is out of the picture, he just wants to squirm back into your life. He's lonely. He may or may not be heartfelt in his want to come back. maybe he really does feel bad. But he needs to stop being subtle and flat out tell you... "I screwed up majorly. I don't know if you can ever trust me again, but I'd like to try to work things out if you think you can."
None of this subtle, manipulative sexual innuendo crap. Good luck... be strong!
Re: Status on the OW wendieann: [quote author=2be link=topic=27057.msg261587#msg261587 date=1143213562">
I agree with the others, that now the OW is out of the picture, he just wants to squirm back into your life.
None of this subtle, manipulative sexual innuendo crap. Good luck... be strong!
[/quote">
I agree!!!!! ;D
You know, in my head, I don't think I could ever just have sex with my X... I don't think I could really enjoy it knowing, he vowed his "love" for someone else... he touched someone else, he left me for someone else... :'(
I know I wouldn't want to do anything with him sexually... not knowing, the OW was there... her body there...doing, whatever.
I know, >:( I would be constantly wondering, "gee, am I as good as her? did he learn that from her? Do I feel like her? etc.etc." ???
IMHO, his lips touched mine, and we said, I DO... under no circumstances were those lips suppose to touch anyone elses... He was MINE... I was HIS... I wasn't sharing... >:(
Too much water under the bridge for me.... no matter how much I love him. :'(
