And EVERYONE Stared brokenbaby: Hey,
I wanted to tell you I found this site. A website, yes. Where I made friends. Friends who are there when I need them. Friends who listen when I talk. Friends who know how I feel. Friends who started talking behind my back. Friends who started to ignore me, be annoyed by me, be burdened by me. Same old friends I had at home. I guess people are the same everywhere, aren't they babe.
How is it you left with nothing to say? I rode my bull into the china shop and you told me I was too loud. I ditched the bull for ballet slippers and you told me I was to submissive. I told you I loved you and you said, why do you say that so often? It makes it mean nothing. I didn't tell you I loved you and you said I didn't trust you. I said I trust you and you lied to me. I said you lied to me and you said I didn't love you. You say you gave it a chance and another and another. I did all the work, what where you giving? You picked me up by the neck, and insisted it was never hitting. Never. You and your beautiful blue eyes, strong arms and comforting presence. Trashed my things and broke my heart.
I got what I went for, I got what I asked. It feels so much like I am trying to fight gravity in this struggle. You are still putting me last even though you are months (4) and miles away. I'm sorry. Maybe I didn't try, cry, lie, enough. Maybe I couldn't be shy enough. Maybe I couldn't fake it.
You've got to trust people you always told me. You have no friends you would belittle me. I had a friend, she told you lies, she told you I cheated. You believed her and left me. That was the second time you walked out. I had friends who laughed too loud for you, talked too much, flirted too much, didn't dress enough. Whatever, they could not be my friend. You said so. I was better off alone anyway. So I thought.
And now I think again. The way I look at life is that we are being kept alive until we are killed. We will all die. What lesson is valuable enough that all of this pain can teach us before we just die?
You caught me. Yes you did. I loved, I cared, I gave. And I got screwed. I took all of you, every bit and I said okay I accept you. You took all of me, chewed it up and spit it back in my face. And said here, get it through your thick fucking head you stupid bitch.
And everyone stared.
Re: And EVERYONE Stared Alliance_22: Amen!
im a guy, and my GF did the same as your BF.
I feel your pain... i gave her my soul, now only find that how foolish i was, she now just left me for dead on the side of the road, like our 5 years meant nothing at all to her. So much spoiling i did to her.... i made her beautiful, gave her confidence and ego.... now she thinks she can fly... perhaps she can, i really want to give up on my one, but i cant seem to find the power.
Good post.
Re: And EVERYONE Stared brokenbaby: We will find the strength. Or so 'they' say.
Whoever 'they' are.
Re: And EVERYONE Stared sudboy: [quote author=brokenbaby link=topic=27518.msg267170#msg267170 date=1144387335">
Whoever 'they' are.
[/quote">
BB if you do find out who "they" are please share with the rest of us. I'd like to find out who exactly is behind this collective wisdom!
Sudboy
Re: And EVERYONE Stared sheydp: I am one of the "they". You WILL find the strength. You ARE finding the strength. You are posting. You are talking. You are working through the pain. And BB... you DO have friends. Friends that DON'T talk behind your back. Friends that care. Because I am one. I am one of the "they" and I am one of your friends, if you will have me.
Shey
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