Does Anyone Have a Success Story Mazzalee: Has anyone here gone through the totally terrifyinf fear of being alone after a breakup. Just not being able to be in your apartment or anything. Just being so scared of not knowing and just wanting that bad person back so the pain will stop.
I;m sure alot of people have, but does anyone have a success story of totally getting through it and feeling good and moving on?
Re: Does Anyone Have a Success Story lilly10: Yes Mazzalee many of us have success stories.
I was in your shoes and I remember not seeing an end in sight. I felt scared and so alone and wondered how I would get through it all. I hated being in my house everything reminded me of "us".
I can say that I am totally through this and feel very good. I moved on a few months ago and am glad that I went through everything and all the pain ( I know that sounds strange). You know what the thing is you have to go through all the hurt and pain to get to acceptance. It is a sucky ride but I can say the strength that I have found is amazing.
I truly feel I have been given a new lease on life and feel happy and content!!
Keep pushing yourself you will get there.
Re: Does Anyone Have a Success Story Hopeless: In my situation, I was left alone in the home. My W of 12 years gave me the whole "I dont love you anymore" story and moved out. It sucked for months. Its been 8 months since then and there is no hope of getting back together, but to be honest, I dont even know her anymore. I guess I still love her but its hard to keep loving someone you just dont know.
It has gotten easier over time. One thing is for certain, finding someone new is NOT the answer.
I am not completely over it and I dont think I ever will, but hey.....Life goes on and I will be a better person for it.
Days turn into weeks and weeks turn into months and so on, it just takes time and you will learn to adapt and be a better person. And someday you'll be at the supermarket and someone will look at you in a way that melts your heart once again. Trust me it will happen.
Re: Does Anyone Have a Success Story Bea: Mazzalee, let me tell you my story which is similar to many stories here.
When my STBX decided he didn't want to be married anymore, I had to move back with my family because I depended on him 100%. I was in school, I had no job, no place to stay, I felt like a complete failure. Not to mention I had to move back to my country since I had immigrated to Canada after the marriage. I thought I was going to lose it, I woke up every morning feeling like crawling under my bed, I felt afraid like a child who's lost in the woods. I remember I sat on the shower floor and I cried and prayed and asked God not to let me fall. It was a very difficult time in my life, and no matter how many people I had around, I never felt more alone. I had just lost not only the love of my life, but my financial security as well. I was brokenhearted and defenseless.
Time went on, with the help of my family and friends I recovered some strength, found a job, kept myself busy, kept in contact with my old friends, made new ones, went out, joined the gym, took care of myself, lost weight, found a therapist. I knew I had to do all these things in order to put myself back together because giving up wasn't an option. I knew there was a way out and I was desperately looking for it. I made a few mistakes during the process, but I learned from them. I even realized I was able to have feelings for someone else, even if it didn't last long.
My mom said my wings were healing, so I could fly again. And that happened eventually, I wanted to fly again and 11 months after my split I decided to be courageous, packed my bags and came back to Canada, this time as a Canadian citizen, to a totally different city, to new people, to new experiences. I applied to finish my B.Sc. and got admitted, applied for a student loan/scholarship from the government and got it. I've been back in school since January and even if I still have my down days, I couldn't be happier. I have new friends, I've discovered my sense of independence, I know I'm capable of doing things by myself, I'm getting good grades, I'm focused on my future and I'm doing everything I can to make it work.
All this... All by myself. It was a personal challenge for me not to depend on anyone. I have a wonderful family in my country and I know I always can count on them. But right now I want to learn to fly solo and I think I'm doing it well. Yes, I feel sad. Yes, I still have to deal with divorce issues, but I'm stronger, much stronger.
This, for me, is a success story. And you will have yours to share when the time is right and after you give yourself the time to experience everything that comes after love is gone. You will make it, I promise!
Re: Does Anyone Have a Success Story tara: I have a success story.
I went through most of the emotions we all do -- fear, terrible sadness, lost 20 pounds (on my 5'2" frame). I moved into a decent apartment and nearly fell over when I tried to paint.
A year and a half after the actual separation (but almost 5 years after the divorce talks began), I'm moving in with my SO, I'm secure in my emotions and my finances, and I'll be attending law school in the fall on a full scholarship. My ex is also happily partnered (remarried), and his stepdaughter is good friends with my SO's daughter.
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