Re: sexual addiction?? toofreshtothinkright: I'm going to talk to someone about this. You know, I have no idea even how to begin to realize what I lost because of it. I lost a good 50 years with my would have been wife. She just felt so disconnected from me intimately.
I cannot believe that this contributed significantly to my breakup. Not only do I feel ashamed, how do I let my ex know? She deserves to know. she knew liked porn, but she had no idea or maybe even knew that someone could get addicted to it. I certainly didn't until all I have been doing is reflecting on everything. I looked into it closer and realzied that I truly was.
PLease, anyone out there (guy or girl) that really likes porn and is in a relationship, please ask yourself if it is hurting your relationship. YOu may not think it is, but it is. I have lost the best thing that has ever happened to me. She was gorgeous. She was a marathon runner, and the best personality you could imagine. And I made her feel unwanted, unsexy and unloved because of this. I wanted to marry her, she wanted to marry me. BUt one trouble area kept coming up...sex.
How do you apologize for that? All she wanted was to feel special to me and wanted to think she was sexy in my eyes.
You have no idea what this addiction has done to my life. I feel like I am a monster, that I don;t deserve to have a second chance. Everyone is telling me that I will find someone else, and that may be true. But what if this happens again? What if I don't find someone like her again? She was truly my soulmate and I couldn;t let her know or make her feel that due to my trouble.
It is hard to live with. She has found someone that will treat her right and see her for what she is - as damn near a perfect girlfriend as you could ever want.
Just how do you forgive yourself and how do you let her know?
Re: sexual addiction?? flyaway: Yes. PM me if you want the details. The two things you mentioned destroyed my marriage of almost 11 years. :(
fly girl
Re: sexual addiction?? toofreshtothinkright: I sent you a PM flyaway.
You know, I am sitting here on a Sat afternoon on the computer. My new roomate just moved in becuase my gf moved out a 3 weeks ago. I find myself wondering what would we be doing if we were going out. Probably doing something like shopping or going to chapters or just going for a walk. Things I would sell my soul for right now. But you know what, I bet if we were together, I'd be wondering why we weren;t fooling around.
I can just imagine the pressure she felt. She was an amazing lover and more than any person who is normal would want and need. I couldn;t see that. I am not a religious man by any stretch of the imagination, but I have asked god for the strentgh to get me trhough this and let me become a better person. I owe it to my ex. I am really not even thinking about myself right now - I owe it to her. She is happy with someone else right now, probably someoen who treats her the way she always should have been treated. That is the worst realization. I Just this damn issue got in the way........
Re: sexual addiction?? mikeymcadam: porn is good. if your ex didn't agree with it then they were not the right person for you. find someone who likes porn so you can watch it together. that is the best.
Re: sexual addiction?? toofreshtothinkright: she did watch porn...that wasn't the issue......but she shouldn't feel incompetition with it - and i gave her reason to. that's when it starts affecting the actaul intimate relationship.
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