Re: My First Post Ciera: I'm sorry for where you are. I do have to commend you though. It sounds like you are doing your best to processes everything. Real love is caring enough about someone else to put ourselves second. Some of us do this to the extreme and that's not a good thing. But the fact that you love her enough to let her go find her happiness shows you really do love her. It's very sad to me that love like that has to be set aside when so many look for that kind of love. I wish you all the luck in the world. You will love again and you will be loved back. Therapy and exercise sound like great moves for you. In the end of this you will be a better person, not that you aren't a good one now. :) May love and happiness find you down the road.
Re: My First Post hurtnconfused: I don't have any good advice or thoughts but, I just wanted to send you some (((hugs)))
Re: My First Post 2be: Welcome. Many of the "leavers" tend to focus on the negative aspects because that is the power they need to validate leaving. I am not saying they blow things out of proportion but concentrating on the bad makes it easier to leave.
However, after leaving and being on their own (unless they jump into another relationship too soon) they soon contact you again wondering why it couldn't be worked out. And THAT is because once the "source" of the bad stuff (ie YOU) is no longer there, that bad stuff drops away and leaves good memories, guilt, etc.
I think that is the basic concept behind the "no contact" rule if you want your X to return to you. You let them sit in those thoughts until they come crawling back. Some do it for the security blanket and some do it sincerely. ONly time will tell if your wife does this.
I commend you for staying amicable and wanting to see her happy... especially for your kids. Although I miss my X's good traits I can honestly say I am happier now than I have been in a long, long time.
Good luck to you and keep posting....
Re: My First Post LNC: Thanks Bug, hurtnconfused, 2be for the words of encouragement.
I was just talking with my friend in my office and she said the same thing. It is a rocky road up ahead. You know i was feeling pretty low this morning, but after posting, reading and talking to my friend, it has brighten up my day. I am looking forward to my daughter's game tonight.
I want to stay amicable thoughout this ordeal. I will be the one handling all the paper work for us and filing them at court so it will be tough. But i have to be strong...
Thanks for your posts
LNC
Re: My First Post Maximus: LNC, it sounds like you are staying sensible through your proceedings, and I admire that. You have come to the right place to seek comfort and support. I joined here a few days ago, and everyone seems so kind and supportive. Have you checked out our blogs? Members post links to their own personal pages, where you can check out more of their stories. I have found that this helps me. I even made one for myself, but am still in the "learning phase" and asking members for help in making it a better structured blog.
:)
